Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"They misunderestimated me."Bentonville, Ark., Nov. 6, 2000
 
 

Random Quote
 
"George Hendrick simply lost that sun-blown pop-up."
— San Diego Padres announcer Jerry Coleman, during on-air coverage
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#81 Alaska has more caribou then people.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so fat the National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. How are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same?
A. Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.
 
 


The Beautiful Secretary

By: LauraPublished: 02/28/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her... don't reject the guy outright. So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the king from wanting to marry her.

So, after a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75-carat diamond ring with a matching 200-carat diamond tiara." The African king pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No problem!! I have. I have."

Realizing her first condition was too easy the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100-room mansion in London. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France." The African king pauses for awhile. He whips out his cellular phone & calls some brokers in New York and in France. He looks at the woman, nods his head and says, "Okay, okay. I build. I build."

Realizing that she only has one last condition, the secretary knows that she'd better make this a good one. She takes her time to think & finally she gets an idea. A sure-to-work condition. She squints her eyes, looks at the man and says, rather coldly, "Since I like sex, I want the man I marry to have a 14-inch penis." The man seems a bit disturbed. He cups his face with his hands and rests his elbows on the table, all the while muttering in African dialect.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the king shakes his head, looking really sad, and says to the woman, "Okay, okay. I cut. I cut.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Want to date lots of women?
Related Links
  • Stephen King Buys Van That Hit Him
  • Don King
  • Holy Fah King Bull Sheet!
  • Holy Fah King Bull Sheet!
  • Larry King
  • The King's Auction Has Princely Bids
  • Even kings and presidents have bad mornings!
  • Fruit Packing
  • Factiods You Cannot Live Without
  • Burglar May Have Gotten Stuck
  • French Joke
  • Three guys and a genie
  • Burgers, Fries, Cocaine To Go?
  • Botched Circumcisions Kill Three
  • Anal Boot
  • Onion Skinning
  • Decanting
  • Elvis' Report Card Auctioned for $8,000
  • The Horny Gorilla
  • Principal Gets Stoned - Students Arrested

  • More Miscellaneous Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    1st!!! Cows Rule (0 replies)  
    started by devilcow
    (11.30.2000 3:13:53 PM EST)

    Ouchy.

    THE COW OF THE DEVIL RULES OVER ALLL MMMMMMMMWWWWWWWWWUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    At The Urologist
    My internal medicine doctor got me a referral to a ...
    09.04.2008

    Depression
    I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline. Got ...
    08.29.2008

    Entertainment At The Senior Center
    It was entertainment night at the Senior Center. Claude ...
    08.20.2008

    An Active, Productive Retirement!
    I've often been asked, "What do you do now that you're ...
    08.19.2008

    Rate This!

    3.11 Goofballs of 5
    87 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    The Greeter
    A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks ...
    08.29.2007

    Depression
    A businessman was in a great deal of trouble. His ...
    08.24.2007

    Sunburn
    A guy falls asleep on the beach for several hours ...
    08.22.2007

    A Walk In The Woods
    While walking through the Colorado woods, a man ...
    08.19.2007

    Two Years Ago
    One Legged Gold Digger
    A South African gold miner was injured at work and ...
    09.05.2006

    Hey Boy, Whatcha Got There?
    Old man sitting on his porch in Louisiana at 6 a.m ...
    08.28.2006

    Recently, I Was Diagnosed With A. A. A. D. D.
    Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is ...
    08.27.2006

    Seeing Eye Dog
    Two women were out for a Saturday stroll. One had ...
    08.22.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Top Selling Videos

    Goofball Facts
     
    Giraffes have no vocal cords.