Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"I had the honor of calling Dale Earnhardt, Jr., after the race, to congratulate him. I said, there's nothing wrong with a fellow following in his father's footsteps."—Bush, on Feb. 16, the day after watching racecar driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. win the Daytona 500. (Dale Earnhardt, Sr. died in a crash on the last lap of the Daytona 500 in 2001.)
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions --but I don't always agree with them."
— George Bush
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#176 The first bike was called a hobbyhorse.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
house is is so small she has to go outside to eat a large pizza.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Did you hear Lorena Bobbit was killed in a car crash yesterday?
A: Some dick cut her off.
 
 


Before It Starts

By: RobnoxiousPublished: 01/05/2001
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, "Get me a beer before it starts." The wife sighs and gets him a beer.

Fifteen minutes later, he says, "Get me another beer before it starts." She looks cross, but fetches another beer and slams it down next to him. He finishes that beer and a few minutes later says, "Quick, get me another beer, it's going to start any minute."

The wife is furious. She yells at him "Is that all you're going to do tonight? Drink beer and sit in front of that TV? You're nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob, and furthermore..."

The man sighs and says, "It's started...."

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Learn The Secrets Of Women And Dating
Related Links
  • Wife Accused of Running Over Husband After Church
  • Man Accused Of Driving Wife Over Cliff In Van
  • Man Says He Was Asleep When He Killed Wife
  • Slain Wife Buried In Another's Casket
  • Wife Stabs Husband After He Brings Her Bouquets
  • Won't You Shoot My Wife Tonight?
  • Wife Runs Over Husband; After Church
  • Tasteless Wife Joke #2
  • Duct Tape Keeps Wife Faithful
  • Wife Sues For Divorce After Sexual Rebuff
  • Birthday Gifts for the Wife
  • Birthday Gifts for the Wife
  • Husband and Wife Switch Places With Sex Change
  • Husband or Wife?
  • Russian Wife Pierced By Enthusiastic Husband
  • Man Convicted For Giving Wife The Bird
  • Ohio Man Gets A Piece From Wife
  • Charging Sheep Kill Farmer's Wife
  • Jealous wife
  • Darva Conger - Ex-Millionaire Wife

  • More Men / Women Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    BULLSHIT!!! (0 replies)
    started by wolfchile69
    (06.04.2001 8:10:39 PM EST)

    ...(My wife won't even get me the damn beer!!!)...

    I take myself to the dirty part of town, where all my troubles can be found!!!

    Like it (0 replies)
    started by ala
    (01.29.2001 8:53:15 PM EST)

    I like it!

    and (0 replies)
    started by birdman
    (01.20.2001 8:10:41 PM EST)

    They wonder why we go to the bar?

    shaddup (0 replies)
    started by greenapplesplatters
    (01.08.2001 10:40:32 PM EST)

    Soooo fucking true.

    Strike a blow for freedom ... Slap a Democrat!

    anononymous Goofball (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (01.06.2001 9:51:02 PM EST)

    Sorry...just don't like giving out my password info. Why do you need it anyway??

    Yeah right...won't answer me. Go figure

    Before it starts (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (01.06.2001 9:33:34 PM EST)

    That was a really GOOD ONE.!!! Got a good chuckle out of that. Thanks again

    cute (0 replies)
    started by thelizard
    (01.05.2001 9:23:34 AM EST)

    That was cute !!!!

    Poison Clan rocks the world !!!!

    Well I liked it! (0 replies)
    started by obiwan
    (01.05.2001 6:38:49 AM EST)

    And I havent heard it before. So thank you Rob!

    E-chuta!

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    8 Words With Two Meanings
    1. THINGY (thing-ee) n. Female...... Any part under ...
    11.13.2008

    This One's For The Women
    He said . .. . I don't know why you wear a bra; you've ...
    11.12.2008

    Words That Have Two Meanings
    1. THINGY (thing-ee) , Female -- Any part under ...
    10.05.2008

    Here's Your Sign
    A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase ...
    10.04.2008

    Rate This!

    3.53 Goofballs of 5
    108 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Dusty Underware
    One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, ...
    11.22.2007

    Cynical Look At Marriage
    You have two choices in life: You can stay single ...
    11.21.2007

    The Amish Daughter
    An Amish woman and her daughter were riding in an ...
    11.16.2007

    The Happiest Day Of His Life
    It was the happiest day of his life ...
    11.07.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Sex In The Dark
    There was this couple that had been married for 20 ...
    12.02.2006

    New ATM Procedures
    A sign in the local Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles ...
    11.27.2006

    Shrinking Walter
    A scientist named Walter invented a shrinking ray. ...
    11.19.2006

    Aging Body Parts
    A family is sitting around the supper table. The son ...
    11.10.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Mug Shots : Celebrities Under Arrest

    Goofball Facts
     
    August has the highest percentage of births.