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George W. Bush
"It's going to be very important for the Iraqi authorities to reach out to those people and talk about a system that guarantees minority rights, and a system which says that for some the future is bright." —Bush, speaking in Washington, D.C., Dec. 15, 2003

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"When they talk about taxing the rich, they're really talking about taxing the working men and women of this country."
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#177 The first sailing boats were built in Egypt.

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A: Bisexual!

The Dialectizer

By: TheThingPublished: 09/04/1999
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This site originally came to us via a comment made on a media file that parodied a Delta Airlines commercial done in "jive". I always try out the links that I see people have posted on our site, especially when it's been posted by one of our "regulars" like The Thing.

Being a bit of a software development geek myself, I could certainly appreciate how The Dialectizer was put together. It basically will translate a phrase that you input or even an entire webpage into various dialects such as "Cockney", "Jive", "Redneck", and "Elmer Fudd". In terms of technology, this is not rocket science, but the results can be very interesting, especially when you consider the selection of inputs out there.

So let's try this. Here is some text I entered:
What have you done to prevent children from viewing the adult content?
Not a damn thing! Although we wouldn't want kids to view content that would be harmful to them, it is simply not and couldn't be our job to protect kids from what is on the internet. This job belongs to their parents. Surf with your kids and do not let them wander around the Net unsupervised.

Translated it into "redneck" and got:
Whut in tarnation haf yo' done t'prevent chillun fum viewin' th' adult corntent?
Not a dadburn thin'! Fry mah hide! Although we'dn't be hankerin' kids t'view corntent thet'd be harmful t'them, it is simply not an' c'dn't be our job t' proteck kids fum whut is on th' internet. This hyar job belongs t'their parents. Surf witcher kids an' does not let them wan'er aroun' th' Net unsupervised, cuss it all t' tarnation.

So the next thing I did, of course, was to translate the home page of, which ended up looking pretty amusing. The first thing I noticed was one of feature's titles that said "Goofball, ah Right fine Site of th' Week An' fo' our next seleckshun..." - I had to laugh.

The best about this the the new "dialectized" page it builds you is that all of the links have been rewritten so that when you click on them, they will lead you to "dialectized" versions of those links. Want to lighten up your day? Start using this site as your new homepage. I know you all like to use as your home page every day, but it might be funny change of pace. I'm quite certain your financial news or corporate intranet would be a lot more interesting if they ran through the Dialectizer all day.

This is not to say that this hasn't already been done. Alta Vista's BabelFish was written to perform language translations on websites and inputted phrases some time ago, but the languages they support are of the more traditional kind (e.g. French, Spanish, German, Italian, etc.)

Babelfish was what we had used to translate our Uncensored section's Gentleman's Glossary into different languages sometime ago. We stopped translating and updating these foreign versions of the glossary due to lack of interest on the part of our viewers, but here they are on last time:

  • French Glossary
  • Spanish Glossary
  • Italian Glossary
  • German Glossary

    So does anyone know where they got the name Babblefish from?

    Dis site weviewed by JSkiwws. Oh, dat scwewy wabbit!.

    Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of

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    This Section


    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    This is a great site (0 replies)
    started by roger
    (05.22.2003 3:33:34 AM EST)

    I use it a lot also

    Just protecting my sheep
    This is a great site (0 replies)
    started by roger
    (05.22.2003 3:33:23 AM EST)

    I use it a lot also

    Just protecting my sheep
    Answer: Babel Fish (0 replies)
    started by stacyvt
    (12.11.2000 0:26:49 AM EST)

    In the book The Hitchiker's Guide To The Galaxy, by Douglass Adams, A Babel Fish is a small yellow fish that, when inserted into the ear, would translate any language in the universe instantly such that to the wearer, it would sound as if it was in their native language.

    Babelfish (0 replies)
    started by RevEf
    (11.20.2000 7:50:31 PM EST)

    It is DOUGLAS Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was in print first, and the Babel Fish is a small yellow fish with psychic powers that when shoved into your ear allows you to understand any language. And it had 5 parts and a short story. Heathens.

    "Damn. It's that weird kid again."

    food (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (11.13.2000 7:10:11 PM EST)

    We are feeding six in the lunch room today. I'm eating too!

    Babblefish (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (09.06.2000 6:54:50 AM EST)

    as i'm sure you've been told, it comes from 'the hitchiker's guide to the galaxy' by, i believe, douglas adams....check it's a 4 part trilogy with many yuks

    Babelfish (1 reply)  
    started by ilkhan
    (06.13.2000 1:44:51 AM EST)

    Babelfish came from a small series by David Adams, called Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy. It aired on BBC in England and has also enjoyed a large reputation in print, being the first trilogy to come in five parts.

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    A cat has four rows of whiskers.