Caption Contest - January 2001
By: Robnoxious	Published: 01/01/2001
Okay, you know the drill. Check out the silly picture below, give us a funny, witty, original caption and be in the running for a free goofball.com t-shirt. Fill in the comment field below and submit, please note that your comments will appear on this page. Take a few minutes to read the postings below and try not to duplicate a caption. The top three captions will win t-shirts so don't delay - get your best caption in now! Contest ends January 31, 2001. Winners will be notified via email, so make sure your profile is up-to-date with a valid email address. Invalid addresses forfeit the prize. Winners have seven days to respond and provide their snail mail address. If any of the winners fails to claim their prize... I'm keeping the shirt for next month. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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I've got nothing to add (3 replies) started by babybear (05.20.2004 5:33:21 PM EST) I just wanna see my name on this great page.

Umm... (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (07.17.2003 8:15:43 PM EST) the picture wont load. How am I suppose to make a comment and win a t-shirt, without knowing what the picture is of. haha

Last Place. (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (03.28.2003 9:08:16 PM EST) I was just looking for my car keys. I thought I might as well check to see if I left them here.

Is it still open for comments?? (0 replies) started by roger (02.23.2003 12:38:01 PM EST) Here we go: Lady: I just came from the principle's office. Our daughter was caught with a German Shepherd. Soldier: Those damn German Sheep Herders oughta be shot. Redneck in background: Did someone say, "Sheep?" Just protecting my sheep from that faggot MonkBubble

Well ..... (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.20.2003 3:48:08 PM EST) here it is February 2003 and still no winner has been picked. So I reread every last one of them and now I understand why there hasn't been a winner. Weak Weak Weak It's funny, they seemed funnier before. I guess it was one of those, You had to have been there kind of things.

No Winner, No Morning Blows (3 replies) started by thegrandpatron (11.19.2002 7:58:29 AM EST) I once entered a contest it's true... But a winner was never picked by the crew... They're just like my Mrs... I get lots of kisses... But as far as what I want, I'm way overdue...

Please put me out of my misery (1 reply) started by thegrandpatron (09.30.2002 7:34:01 PM EST) To have a contest was the staffs plan.... and I have watched this since it began.... I have read them all.... through spring, summer and fall.... But two years is enough for any one man....

Hey GP... (1 reply) started by proverbialchump (06.19.2002 10:31:06 PM EST) their still here.

Not Again... (5 replies) started by thegrandpatron (04.14.2002 7:19:12 PM EST) What do you mean President Bush and his staff want to see me about an "April Ccontest"?

It's over!! (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (04.14.2002 7:17:18 PM EST) Look Ben, I told my boyfriend I was going out for a pack of smokes. So I'd better get home. I've been gone for over a year now.

"What do you mean... (1 reply) started by proverbialchump (04.14.2002 5:05:52 PM EST) Goofball is replacing us with another updated closed caption contest?" "Thats kind of sudden, isnt it?"

Bengay Cryingame *thinking*: (0 replies) started by tjshere (04.13.2002 0:48:55 AM EST) Hmmmmmm, the friction burns between Lotta's boobs look exactly like the ones I have. I think Cpl. Gapingrear will have some explaining to do when he gets home tonight. Never fear.....TJ's here!

Am I too late? (0 replies) started by sasksquatch (04.10.2002 11:07:35 PM EST) Yeah... This country IS being ruined by crack!

lotta cox:.... (3 replies) started by dtahellyeah (04.10.2002 2:28:00 PM EST) this is the best crouching position that the army has? private crying game:no,but.... lotta coxs:good,cause i can do better than this,you should how i get all the guys back home to give me a honarable discharge,when i get on my knees.... private crying game:well not as good as the salutes i get here,on my knees. Don't Trust Anyone

too bad they dont start this game up again (1 reply) started by thaking4u (04.09.2002 8:17:49 PM EST) i replied to this last year I HAVE THE KNOWLEDGE (0 replies) started by donut38 (01.13.2001 0:54:42 AM EST) TO KEEP ALL THE BOYS HAPPY AND I`M WILLING TO GIVE YOU A FREE DEMONSTATION hahaha

Fraternization amongst the ranks. (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (04.07.2002 9:20:15 PM EST) "You better leave my Daddy alone,Its killing my Mom!" "Who are you," ask Bengay. "Im Captain Pillowbiters daughter you home wrecking, Richard Simmons wanna be."

Lotta Cox: (4 replies) started by thegrandpatron (04.07.2002 6:54:35 PM EST) I know you're my brother and all. But if you don't stop wearing my Bras and Panties I'm going to kick your Ass. You're stretching out my Bras, you grunt moron.

Lotta Cox: (1 reply) started by tjshere (04.06.2002 11:43:12 AM EST) "No, that isn't a tattoo. It's just discoloration from by boyfriend's silver belly-button ring." Bengay Cryingame: "Hmmmmm. Cpl. Gapingrear's ring must be stainless steel." Never fear.....TJ's here!

Lotta Cox: (4 replies) started by thegrandpatron (03.31.2002 6:44:56 PM EST) I went and asked my Priest. Nobody cares, if you served our country in Desert Storm. That ain't calling you "Bengay the Brave". Nobody cares, if you were on Guard Duty and Killed that clown shooting at the White House. That ain't calling you a "Bengay the Hero". But if you get caught sucking one Cock, they are going to call you a "Bengay the Cocksucker" for the rest of your life. Deal with it!

Lotta Cox storms in, and says, (2 replies) started by proverbialchump (03.29.2002 6:06:49 AM EST) "Pvt. Bengay Cryingame,where through, I tell you! Sticking my cell phone up your ass, and asking me to give you a ring, was the last straw!!!"

any day but Thursday (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (03.28.2002 10:39:39 PM EST) Lotta Cox: Hey Private, I hear you have a barrel in your barracks where you can stick your dick in a hole and get what feels like a great Blow Job. Private I-cry-for-my-Mommy: Yes Mam, any day but Thursday. Lotta Cox: Why not Thursday? Private I-cry-for-my-Mommy: Because Thursday is my day in the barrel.

OK, you axed for it (4 replies) started by tjshere (03.28.2002 10:01:29 PM EST) Lotta Cox: I wanna join the Marines because I'm looking for a few good men. Private Cryingame: Then you've come to the right place, ma'am. Lotta Cox: Why? Are you a good man? Private Cryingame: No, but I enlisted for the same reason as you. Never fear.....TJ's here!

The Chick, (4 replies) started by thegrandpatron (03.26.2002 9:33:30 PM EST) Look Private I cry for my Mommy, I don't care if your tits are bigger than mine. Can you squeese them together so hard, that Hair Dye runs down the crack of your Ass?

Hey Private Cryingame... (3 replies) started by proverbialchump (03.20.2002 7:47:53 PM EST) whats that on your pants? I guess your excited to see me, because it looks like the little general got a dishonorable discharge.

Lotta Cox says,... (1 reply) started by proverbialchump (03.20.2002 7:43:37 PM EST) "want me to drop down and give you 20." Private Cryingame says, "no, I want you to bend over and Ill give you 10."

Say there Private Buckshot (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (03.14.2002 10:39:20 PM EST) Do you know how it feels when you have to pee real bad? You do? Then good, feel me and see if I have to pee.

Blow Job? (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (03.10.2002 5:52:05 PM EST) Sure I'd love to give you a "Blow Job". Except you're an Ugly, Skin Headed, Going No Where, Loser.

"Thats not a thong... (2 replies) started by proverbialchump (03.02.2002 8:04:48 AM EST) its a tattoo, you jar head!"

They act like... (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.24.2002 7:30:27 AM EST) ...my wife and I. Sometimes we just stare at each other for what seems like a year at a time. Shit! It's been over a year. Man they're good.

??? (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.05.2002 12:31:38 PM EST) Hey soldier, where's that left hand of yours? I'll bet if I bend over a little more, you'd cream in those camo pants.

February 2002 (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.05.2002 12:28:11 PM EST) You're not even trying to look down my top! Are you a faggit? Oh yeah, don't ask don't tell.

Last name, first name, please? (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (02.01.2002 6:00:36 PM EST) "Cox, Lotta."

I'll try one... (1 reply) started by hothead (01.20.2002 1:10:43 PM EST) Yeah, your impression of a plumber is really good. But were kinda looking for some other types of experience! Yeah, I know, it sucks! Oh well, I tried! Who loves ya, baby?

"Excuse me Sir.. (1 reply) started by proverbialchump (01.12.2002 12:34:40 PM EST) but I have been bent over like this for a year now, and GB still wont announce a winner." LMAO at GP (Maybe next month??)

"Excuse me Sir.. (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (01.12.2002 12:34:12 PM EST) but I have been bent over like this for a year now, and GB still wont announce a winner." LMAO at GP (Maybe next month??)

Well hear we go again. (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (01.09.2002 9:08:25 PM EST) Listen you Pencil Neck Skinhead Bastard. If You're Not A Hemorrhoid, Get Off My Ass.

NOVEMBER (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (11.04.2001 3:19:52 PM EST) I'm BACK!!!!!!!!!!

HELLO! (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (10.03.2001 7:33:10 PM EST) I haven't forgotten about this yet.

Just Checking (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (08.07.2001 9:25:17 AM EST) Hi guys.

I give up (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (07.03.2001 8:57:19 AM EST) Ok I give up. You have out lasted me. Tomorrow is the 4th of July, the year is have over, and I'm beginning to act like my wife where I just can't let something go. It was nice to know you "January 2001 Caption Contest". But like I told an old girlfriend, It's over, don't ruin the memories by being hateful. By-By and Sianarra. Apparently I wouldn't make a very good stalker, if all I can last is six months. But life goes on there's Golf to be played and Beaches to be explored. GP

Why is? (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (07.02.2001 1:59:24 PM EST) Why is being in the Military like a blowjob? The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

I feel like (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.24.2001 8:44:50 AM EST) I feel like Tom Hanks in Castaway. I'm the only person here on this page (island) ever. Am I the only Motherfucker who checks this page? HELLO, is anybody out there?

I'm sorry! (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.16.2001 11:49:20 PM EST) I have just finished reading my posts on this feature and I want to apologize for my rude and foul language. I'm sorry. I have over reacted to you, the Goofball Staff. NOW GIVE ME A GOD-DAM T-SHIRT! Ha! Ha! Just kidding. No really. Pick a winner and put me out of my misery!

Look mam (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.16.2001 11:38:46 PM EST) Look Missy, I'm just a Private. I don't have any Military Secrets for sale..... and if I did, I wouldn't give them to you, for any lousy Blow Job. I can get as many of those as I want. All I have to do is give the Master Sergeant one first.

Now I know (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.13.2001 8:03:01 AM EST) Now I know how a Crack Addict feels. I just can't stop from coming back to this page and leaving a Post. I'm sick man, I need help! Is there anybody out there?

I got my Shit together (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.10.2001 7:10:46 PM EST) OK Goofball Staffers, I got my shit together and got my GIF working (I think, this is actually a test to see if it works). Now get your SHIT together and pick a winner for Christ sake. Hey never mind. I'm probably having more fun with YOU GUYS FUCKING WITH ME!

I need closure (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.07.2001 5:51:48 PM EST) I need closure. I dieing over here. For the love of God man, PICK A WINNER! That's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

Army recruitment (0 replies) started by suspect (06.07.2001 6:09:27 AM EST) Caption quote: "New recruitments undergoing the new rigorous "builders butt" test required under new european law."

It's June (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (06.01.2001 9:22:52 AM EST) It's June you morrons! That's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

If you give me (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (05.30.2001 9:51:32 AM EST) If you give me a "goofball.com t-shirt", I'll show you my pussy has less hair on it than your head does. That's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

Hi, I'd like to sign up for the army.... (0 replies) started by ball4life (05.24.2001 4:28:54 PM EST) GIRL:"Hi, I'd like to sign up for the army, but I'm gay. I got this tatoo from my girlfriend. SUP? GOOFBALL IS PRETTY SWEET, HUH?

What's that smell (0 replies) started by Magillacuddie (05.18.2001 2:11:30 AM EST) I bet you that my breathe smells better than my arse! Shake your spear at Shakespear!

You aren't fooling anybody (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (05.13.2001 10:00:02 AM EST) Look Charlie, it's Mother's Day how long are you going to stay at this Flea Market pretending to be an Army Recruiter? You aren't fooling any of these teenage boys here. Nobody is going to go home with you. Don't you know if your a fag you join the Navy not the Army? You are so stupid sometimes Charlie, I swear! That's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

making men ... (0 replies) started by jlhilbert (04.30.2001 2:37:27 PM EST) My dad said the army could make a man out of anyone....well....can you make a man out of me? I am busy....you're ugly....Have a Nice Day.... :)

April Fool! (0 replies) started by fixxx47 (04.29.2001 10:43:16 AM EST) This really wasn't January's contest.

I've been ..... (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (04.20.2001 9:31:23 AM EST) I've been standing like this since January, man does my back hurt. That's just my opinion, I could be wrong!

Excuse Me (1 reply) started by pcmasteral (04.18.2001 4:43:09 PM EST) I was wondering this contest was supposed to end in january.Anyway well its almost May now any news on when a new picture will be posted.This site is really taking a dive dont you think?

Excuse Me (0 replies) started by pcmasteral (04.18.2001 4:39:05 PM EST) Aparently,I had sex with some of your drunken soldiers last night. Anyway the point is they had a arrow tattooed on my back that points to my a-hole and says "look what i did to you again" would you know anything about this? i thought not...

Crack eh? (0 replies) started by hiphead18 (04.05.2001 1:03:44 AM EST) No im sorry mam, we get all of our crack from lower harlem.

hmm... (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.22.2001 2:29:27 AM EST) Yes mam...that's correct...alls we need is 300 more civilian signatures in order to release the results of JANUARY'S caption contest

hmm... (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.22.2001 2:28:55 AM EST) Yes mam...that's correct...alls we need is 300 more civilian signatures in order to release the results of JANUARY'S caption contest

Sir!! (0 replies) started by Craigboy (03.15.2001 9:14:44 AM EST) I know it's half way through March Sir!! Yes Sir - this is still the January contest Sir! craigboy

duh... (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (03.12.2001 7:24:53 PM EST) Join the army, sweetheart, and I'll teach you how to do real push ups!

Alright Already (0 replies) started by apex (03.01.2001 1:31:22 AM EST) I'm dying to know the results of January's caption contest, but not that bad.

Do you suck dick... (0 replies) started by conner (02.26.2001 4:26:04 AM EST) ,private? Isn't that why I'm here. Ignorance will kill any good man. Much love for Miss PK-

After the successful op. (0 replies) started by tommyp (02.19.2001 9:16:53 AM EST) Im ready for de-briefing sir.

Is? (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.19.2001 9:11:37 AM EST) I've never been fucked up the ASS before. Is this the proper position? Yes, mam. Every family has a Black Sheep, and if you don't think your's does, You're it!

r u gay? (0 replies) started by proverbialchump (02.18.2001 11:56:05 PM EST) umm, Mam, I don't have to answer your question, cause we have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy here.

hey now (0 replies) started by jmnycrkt (02.18.2001 11:05:43 PM EST) is this where i sign up for the Howard Stern look-alike contest?

Hi, um I'm the call girl. (0 replies) started by cheeseball (02.18.2001 5:43:47 AM EST) Can you tell me how to find Major Woody? Work, the curse of the drinking class.

You gave (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.17.2001 10:28:42 AM EST) You gave Colin Powell a Blow Job and this is the best DESK JOB you could get!! Every family has a Black Sheep, and if you don't think your's does, You're it!

A nasty crack... (0 replies) started by bionicweasel (02.16.2001 10:46:33 PM EST) I just wanted to see if you guys really get up at the crack of Dawn!

Tag Team (0 replies) started by funkmunk (02.16.2001 12:52:03 PM EST) I have to blow you AND this guy sitting next to you? Forget it I'll just shave my head.

I will not (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.16.2001 9:53:01 AM EST) "Fuck you. I will not shave my head for the Army. My pussy yes, my head no." Every family has a Black Sheep, and if you don't think your's does, You're it!

Caption...Even Though It's February (0 replies) started by BDevil (02.16.2001 2:16:57 AM EST) "Why, yes, I CAN suck a golf ball through a garden hose...why do you ask?" "I can resist anything except temptation." --Oscar Wilde

coordination test (0 replies) started by DaveTate (02.15.2001 4:01:22 PM EST) I get in the service if I can touch my knees and spell run three times through the whole month of January and February

UMM (0 replies) started by goldentee (02.15.2001 1:48:28 PM EST) Ummmm...what do I need to do to get some of those stupid fucking fatigues? Hunter3

I get it now! (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.15.2001 9:01:46 AM EST) I get it now. This chicks name is Janurary. The contest goes on for the whole year of 2001 !!!!!!!!!!! Every family has a Black Sheep, and if you don't think your's does, You're it!

Tattoo (0 replies) started by beelster (02.15.2001 8:09:29 AM EST) Some dirty cow flashin' her tat. EEE Eagle

big fan (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (02.14.2001 11:41:33 PM EST) hey is this where i sign up for the Howard Stern look-alike contest?

Caption (0 replies) started by Racingirl (02.14.2001 9:37:10 PM EST) Hey boys! Do YOU know the hokey-pokey? I love this page! :)

ass crack (0 replies) started by sctdvr (02.14.2001 4:14:19 AM EST) I heard of skid marks on underwear, but on ass cracks? and your point is......

uhhh.................what (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (02.13.2001 7:03:34 PM EST) did you say GENITAL HERPIES!!!

Beef (0 replies) started by bigpapa69 (02.13.2001 1:58:13 PM EST) Can you tell me where the bathroom is? I just shit my pants.

undies (0 replies) started by gravy (02.13.2001 2:17:25 AM EST) no sir...they are permanent....i don't need your GI undies...

up yours (0 replies) started by ggarcia99 (02.12.2001 10:04:05 PM EST) Ok, so you are telling me that for the next four years i'll be taking it up the ass just like this?

Crack Kills (0 replies) started by nasty669 (02.12.2001 4:05:31 PM EST) Didn't your mama ever tell you that crack kills!!!

1st marriage (0 replies) started by thegrandpatron (02.12.2001 9:43:46 AM EST) This contest is like my first marriage. I got tired of it too, and I thought it would never end either! Every family has a Black Sheep, and if you don't think your's does, You're it!

Caption (0 replies) started by BDevil (02.12.2001 2:43:46 AM EST) "Why, yes, I CAN suck a golf ball through a garden hose." "I can resist anything except temptation." --Oscar Wilde

Yeah but (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (02.11.2001 9:38:10 AM EST) Yeah, but like......I won't have to wear GREEN will I?

regulations (0 replies) started by shade151 (02.10.2001 10:32:56 AM EST) excuse me sir, what are your regulations on battery operated blunt devices? rm

Robnoxious Luvs Him Some bootie (0 replies) started by livinright (02.10.2001 6:28:33 AM EST) Robnoxious luvs him some bootie so much, he's thinking of making this the caption contest for febuary also................feb 10 , 2001.......joking dude, its all good thought for everyday, Will I get Laid

Application (0 replies) started by sn00pydwg (02.09.2001 12:30:40 PM EST) I'ld like to apply for the Monica Lewinsky internship program

Bill's interns (0 replies) started by federalobserver (02.09.2001 7:24:31 AM EST) Just how many interns are applying? It doesn't matter we can USE all of them. President Clinton was advised several time this summer that Madeline Albright was fucking things up in Israel. Advice ignored leads to many deaths. This is the same way Clinton ignored the school shootings he thought would go away in 1997, contrary to ad

oops (0 replies) started by dasotn (02.09.2001 6:24:23 AM EST) Ok is that haircut....like...manadat