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Assorted Goofiness
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George W. Bush |
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"It's important for [the United Nations'] words to mean what they say, andas we head into the 21st century, Mark, when it comes to our security, wereally don't need anybody's permission."—Bush, during a press conference in 2003 (in the 21st century) Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President George Bush Discusses Iraq inNational Press Conference," March 6, 2003
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Random Quote |
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"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."
— Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice. (1982)
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Snapple Facts |
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#153 The speed limit in NYC was 8 mph in 1895.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so hairy she looks like a Chia Pet with an Afro!
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One Liners |
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Q: What do you call the blonde corpse in your attic?
A: 1995 hide-and-seek champion!
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 The Right tool for the job | | By: Dirk Steele | Published: 09/14/1999 | | |  |
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There was this little guy sitting in a bar, drinking,
minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big
dude comes in and --WHACK!!-- knocks him clean off the bar
stool and onto the floor.
The idiot says, "That was a karate chop from Korea."
The little guy thinks "GEEZ," but he gets back up on the
stool and starts drinking again when all of a sudden --WHACK!!-
the big dude knocks him down AGAIN and says, "That was a judo
chop from Japan."
So the little guy has had enough of this... He gets up,
brushes himself off and quietly leaves.
The little guy is gone for an hour or so. When he returns,
without saying a word, he walks up behind the big idiot and --
BONG!!-- bangs the big dude off his stool, knocking him out
cold.
The little guy looks at the bartender and says, "When he
comes to, tell him that is a crowbar from Sears."
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| Lookie Here!
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Goofball Facts |
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Roosters can't crow if they can't fully extend their necks.
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