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	George W. Bush
	"I'm sure there's a lot of people frightened — biotechnology is a long wordand it sounds — they may say, well, I don't know if I'm smart enough to bein biotechnology, or it sounds too sophisticated to be in biotechnology." —Bush, speaking in Winston-Salem, N.C., on Nov. 7, 2003

	Random Quote
	"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open manhole and die." — Mel Brooks

	Snapple Facts
	#181 The first jukebox was located in San Francisco in 1899.

	Yo Mama ...
	head is so small she use a tea-bag as a pillow.

	One Liners
	Q: What's the five day forecast for Afghanistan? A: Two days.

	Quick Joke
	Don't you feel like sitting alone in your home, destroying your belongings while at the same time slowly losing all your household money? Try poker online

Most Recent
	Psychiatrists Vs. Bartenders Ever since I was a child I've always had a fear of ... 05.01.2009 In Need of a Push A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it's 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed ... 01.28.2009 Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008

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One Year Ago
	In Need of a Push A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it's 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed ... 01.28.2009 Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008 Irish Lent An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet in County Kerry ... 06.10.2008

Two Years Ago
	Guy Luke's Night Out After a hard day logging in the northern wilderness, ... 01.27.2008 Working Nights Murphy came home plastered for the third night in a row. His wife dragged him to the window, pointing to the blazing lights of the big distillery in the distance. 12.18.2007 Impossible To Say While Drunk Things that are downright impossible to say when drunk. 10.20.2007 Eighteen Double Vodkas A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman ... 08.23.2007

Lookie Here!
	Spy vs. Spy Casebook

	Casino Joke
	I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!

	Goofball Facts
	It was illegal to sell ET dolls in France because there is a law against selling dolls without human faces.