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	George W. Bush
	"I would have to ask the questioner. I haven't had a chance to ask the questioners the question they've been questioning. On the other hand, I firmly believe she'll be a fine secretary of labor. And I've got confidence in Linda Chavez. She is a - she'll bring an interesting perspective to the Labor Department." - Austin, Texas, Jan. 8, 2001

	Random Quote
	"The last thing you want is for someone to commit suicide before executing them." — Gary Deland, former Utah director for corrections

	Snapple Facts
	#72 The average person uses 150 gallons of water per day for personal use.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so fat the animals at the zoo feed her.

	One Liners
	Q. What do you get from a pampered cow? A. Spoiled milk.

Most Recent
	Psychiatrists Vs. Bartenders Ever since I was a child I've always had a fear of ... 05.01.2009 In Need of a Push A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it's 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed ... 01.28.2009 Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008

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One Year Ago
	Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008 Irish Lent An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet in County Kerry ... 06.10.2008 New Drink A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and asks, "Bartender, ... 03.21.2008

Two Years Ago
	Impossible To Say While Drunk Things that are downright impossible to say when drunk. 10.20.2007 Eighteen Double Vodkas A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman ... 08.23.2007 Stealing From A Drunk A young man is staggering about drunk with a key in ... 07.18.2007

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	Casino Joke
	I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!

	Goofball Facts
	Armadillos have four babies at a time - always identical quadruplets of the same sex.