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	George W. Bush
	"More Muslims have died at the hands of killers than - I say more Muslims - a lot of Muslims have died - I don't know the exact count - at Istanbul. Look at these different places around the world where there's been tremendous death and destruction because killers kill." - Washington, D.C., Jan. 29, 2004

	Random Quote
	"Just try to imagine what it would be like to be 300 million years old." — President Clinton in Ashe County, N.C. He was speaking on the banks of the New River, which scientists say is the oldest river in the United States.

	Snapple Facts
	#31 The average human will eat an average of 8 spiders while sleeping.

	Yo Mama ...
	... is so fat, She has 48 midnight snacks!

	One Liners
	Q. Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? A. Mace will do that to you.

	Quick Joke
	Don't you feel like sitting alone in your home, destroying your belongings while at the same time slowly losing all your household money? Try poker online

Most Recent
	Psychiatrists Vs. Bartenders Ever since I was a child I've always had a fear of ... 05.01.2009 In Need of a Push A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it's 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed ... 01.28.2009 Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008

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Section Features
	Top Ranked Items

One Year Ago
	In Need of a Push A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push. 'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it's 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed ... 01.28.2009 Beer And Walking A recent study found the average American walks about ... 08.08.2008 More Or Less? A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman ... 08.06.2008 Irish Lent An Irishman moves into a tiny hamlet in County Kerry ... 06.10.2008

Two Years Ago
	Guy Luke's Night Out After a hard day logging in the northern wilderness, ... 01.27.2008 Working Nights Murphy came home plastered for the third night in a row. His wife dragged him to the window, pointing to the blazing lights of the big distillery in the distance. 12.18.2007 Impossible To Say While Drunk Things that are downright impossible to say when drunk. 10.20.2007 Eighteen Double Vodkas A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman ... 08.23.2007

Lookie Here!
	Always postpone meetings with time wasting morons

	Casino Joke
	I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!

	Goofball Facts
	Only seven percent of the population are lefties.