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George W. Bush
 
"Sometimes Washington is one of these towns where the people who think they've got the sharp elbows are the most effective person."Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "George W. Bush Participates in a Terrell-for-Senate Luncheon," Dec. 3, 2002
 
 

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"Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn't go far didn't see him shoot across that floor...I told him he was grounded."
— Tim Allen, Comedian
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#225 There are towns named Sandwich in Illinois and Massachusetts.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
so ugly when a child, she had to be fed with a slingshot!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Did you hear about the male prostitute who got leprosy?
A: He did okay until his business fell off.
 
 

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Don't you feel like sitting alone in your home, destroying your belongings while at the same time slowly losing all your household money? Try poker online
 
 


Blonde Moviegoer

By: tjsherePublished: 04/13/2006
 
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Charlie went to a movie the other evening and sat in an aisle seat as he usually does because it feels roomier to him. He's sitting there with his big tub of popcorn and 32oz Coke and the feature is about to start. Just then, a big heavy-set blond seated in the very center of the row gets up and starts working her way out. "Excuse me, sorry, oops, excuse me, pardon me, oops, excuse me".... etc.

She gets to Charlie, who's more than a bit annoyed at having to shift all his stuff out of the way and with the show about to start. So, he speaks up, "Couldn't you have done this a little earlier!?"

"No" Blondie whispered loudly. "That TURN OFF YOUR CELL PHONE message just flashed on the screen..."

"And, mine's out in the car."

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    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    lmfao (0 replies)
    started by bigjohn2
    (04.18.2006 9:55:29 PM EST)

    good one

    I was certain (0 replies)
    started by tjshere
    (04.13.2006 11:31:42 AM EST)


    That there were no new blonde jokes under the sun, so I was quite jazzed when I saw this one.

    my schween is small but my tongue is mighty!

    Waaa Hahahahaha (2 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (04.13.2006 7:15:50 AM EST)


    My 3rd day back and already a new "funny" joke.
    LOL

    Damn! (0 replies)
    started by ajk454
    (04.13.2006 5:15:27 AM EST)

    I left mine at home. I'll be right back!

    LMAO (0 replies)  
    started by roger
    (04.13.2006 1:39:05 AM EST)


    hadn't heard that one before.

    ^5

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