MEMORANDUM
It has been brought to management's attention that some
individuals
throughout the company have been using foul language during the
course of normal conversation with their coworkers. Due to
complaints received from some employees who may be easily
offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do however realize the critical importance of being able to
accurately express your feelings when communicating with
coworkers, therefore, a list of preferred new phrases has been provided so
that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an
effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive
employees.
Preferred Phrase
* Old Phrase
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Perhaps I can work late
* When the fuck do you expect me to do this?
I'm certain that is not feasible
* No fucking way
Really?
* You've got to be shitting me
Perhaps you should check with ...
* Tell someone who gives a shit
Of course I'm concerned
* Ask me if I give a shit
I wasn't involved in that project
* Its not my fucking problem
That's interesting behavior
* What the fuck?!?!
I'm not sure I can implement this
* Fuck it, it won't work
I'll try to schedule that
* Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?
Are you sure this is a problem
* Who the fuck cares?
He's not familiar with the problem
* He's got his head up his ass
Excuse me sir?
* Eat shit and die motherfucker
So you weren't happy with it?
*Kiss my ass
I'm a bit overloaded at this moment
* Fuck it, I'm on salary
I don't think you understand
* Shove it up your ass
I love a challenge
* This job sucks
You want me to take care of that?
* Who the hell died and made you boss?
I see
* Blow me
Yes, we really should discuss it
* Another fucking meeting!!!!
I don't think this will be a problem
* I really don't give a shit
He's somewhat insensitive
* He's a fucking prick
She's an aggressive go getter
* She's a ball busting bitch
I think you could use more training
* You don't know what the fuck you're doing
