There was this Avon Lady who lived, breathed, ate, and shit Avon.
One evening she was on a sales visit in a big high rise. As she left the final customer's apartment she experienced quite the gas pang... the Avon Lady had to fart. Bad.
At the end of the hall she noticed an open elevator and made it in just in time to emit the grandaddy of flatulence. It was bad. It was horrible! The paint was starting to peel off the wall, and her eyes swelled with tears.
The elevator began its trip down. The stench was evil.
Wondering what the hell to do, the Avon Lady went through her Avon kit... surely something would save her from this ugly embarassment.
Ta-Da! She whips out a small spray bottle of Avon Pine Scent. She sprays a few clouds of the Avon around the small space of the Otis. The crisis was over.
Suddenly, only half-way down the building, the elevator stops. The doors open.
A little drunken man steps in. The doors close and the elevator, again, begins its descent.
The Avon Lady sees the wino's eyes open wide and he starts-a-sniffin... big whiffs... and he mumbles, "Whaa?... WHAT THE HELL IS THAT I SMELL?!"
The Avon lady is so proud of her Avon that she smiles and asks the inebriated passenger, "Well, Mister, what do you THINK it smells like?"
He takes another big sniff and retorts, "Smells like someone took a shit in a Christmas tree!"
Love the country, live to pee outside!
~SweetiePeach~
