Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"I don't remember debates. I don't think we spent a lot of time debating it.. Maybe we did, but I don't remember."-On discussions of the Vietnam War when he was an undergraduate at Yale, Washington Post, July 27, 1999
 
 

Random Quote
 
"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer."
— Frank Zappa
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#116 The largest fish is the whale shark - It can be over 50 feet long and weigh 2 tons.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so old she has Jesus' beeper number!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Mom's have Mother's Day, Dads's have Father's Day. What do single guys have?
A: Palm Sunday.
 
 


Useful Work Phrases

By: LisaLisaPublished: 04/27/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

1) Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
2) The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
3) I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
4) Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
5) I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
6) I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
7) What am I? Flypaper for freaks?
8) I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
9) I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10) Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...
11) I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
12) It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
13) Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
14) No, my powers can only be used for good.
15) How about never? Is never good for you?
16) I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
17) You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
18) I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
19) I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
20) I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
21) Who me? I just wander from room to room.
22) My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
23) It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
24) At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
25) You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
26) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
27) Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • New Phrases / Old Phrases
  • 25 reasons why alcohol should be served at work
  • AA doesn't always work
  • Work of Art
  • Supermodel Mind At Work
  • Top 10 reasons to go to Work Naked
  • Ahhh Yard Work
  • Eight Signs You Have Nothing To Do At Work
  • Will work for . . .
  • For the laides: Will work for food
  • Tractor at work
  • Woman Shocked At Husband´s Work
  • Clinton doing devil's work?
  • Go Postal At Work
  • Whip The Worker
  • How stuff works
  • You know you worked during the 90's if ...
  • Morgue Worker Charged With Photographing Body of Woman
  • Dairy Whip Tax-Deductible For Sex Workers
  • Worker Wins Compensation For Being Promoted

  • More Business Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    ha (0 replies)  
    started by bear5685
    (04.10.2001 3:43:16 AM EST)

    ha

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Seniors & Sales
    Two businessmen in Florida were sitting down for a ...
    01.22.2009

    401-Keg Plan
    If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00
    10.11.2008

    Best 'Out Of Office' Automatic E-mail Replies
    1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview ...
    08.16.2008

    Bad News
    A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing ...
    08.14.2008

    Rate This!

    3.31 Goofballs of 5
    121 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    401-Keg Plan
    If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.00
    10.11.2008

    Best 'Out Of Office' Automatic E-mail Replies
    1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview ...
    08.16.2008

    Bad News
    A patient was at her doctor's office after undergoing ...
    08.14.2008

    Never Question A Drunk
    I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected: A ...
    08.03.2008

    Two Years Ago
    Murphy Applying For A Job
    Murphy applied for an engineering position at an Irish ...
    10.22.2007

    Work & Prison
    Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed ...
    10.21.2007

    Being Late To Work
    Rob came into the office an hour late for the third ...
    08.05.2007

    Mechanic Vs. Cardiologist
    A Mechanic was Removing a Cylinder-head from the motor ...
    07.21.2007

    Lookie Here!
    Top Selling Music

    Casino Joke
     
    I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
     
     

    Goofball Facts
     
    A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.