It has been brought to management's attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their coworkers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated.
We do however realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with coworkers, therefore, a list of preferred new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive employees.
Preferred Phrase
Old Phrase
Perhaps I can work late
When the fuck did you expect me to do this?
I'm certain that is not feasible
No
fucking way
Really?
You've got to be shitting me
Perhaps you should check with ...
Tell someone who gives a shit
Of course I'm concerned
Ask me if I give a shit
I wasn't involved in that project
Its not my fucking problem
That's interesting behavior
What the fuck?!?!
I'm not sure I can implement this
Fuck it, it won't work
I'll try to schedule that
Why the hell didn't you tell me sooner?
Are you sure this is a problem
Who the fuck cares?
He's not familiar with the problem
He's got his head up his ass
Excuse me sir?
Eat shit and die motherfucker
So you weren't happy with it?
Kiss my ass
I'm a bit overloaded at this moment
Fuck it, I'm on salary
I don't think you understand
Shove it up your ass
I love a challenge
This job sucks
You want me to take care of that?
Who the hell died and made you boss?
I see
Blow me
Yes, we really should discuss it
Another fucking meeting!!!!
I don't think this will be a problem
I really don't give a shit
He's somewhat insensitive
He's a fucking prick
She's an aggressive go getter
She's a ball busting bitch
I think you could use more training
You don't know what the fuck you're doing
Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
