Crazy ER Happenings
By: hermozart	Published: 09/13/2000
Having worked security in a hospital for a few years, I learned about some interesting events in the ER. 1. One night, a man came in to the ER, from another town. His complaint was that he had a vibrator stuck inside his ass. When walking past the room, I had seen the doctor place his hand on the man's stomach. The doc's hand was vibrating. (The doctor, completely against normal practice, left the x-rays on the lit board while doing other things, for about 15 minutes). The batteries did not die until they had the man in surgery, where it took around 30 minutes to remove the vibrator. Apparently, the man's girlfriend was away at work. The man and his female roommate decided to experiment because he was "curious". When his girlfriend arrived and found out what happened, she left to go home and pack her things. 2. A husband and wife came in. The problem was that a champaigne bottle was stuck in her vagina, small end first. The bottle had suctioned to her cervix and would not come out. The doctor, a nurse, and a Respiratory Technician spent almost 3 hours attempting to punch a hole in the bottom of the bottle to release the suction, without causing glass to fall inside of her. 3. A man came in with 3 feet, yes I said 3 FEET, of garden hose up his asshole. 4. Two kids (about 16 years old) were brought in on the same gurney due to their genitalia being stuck together. They had been having sex when the girl's vagina had a muscle spasm, tightening around the boy's dick. That caused the boy's dick to swell until it was almost as big around as an apple. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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funny (0 replies) started by gothnails2005 (12.05.2000 10:07:11 PM EST) a lot of these messages are really funny! where do you find them? coming 2-u from the underworld, ~gothnails~

LOL... (0 replies) started by sweetiepeach (11.03.2000 3:49:29 PM EST) ...life..stranger than fiction..:) ~SweetiePeach~

BriBratWitchyBitchSunGode (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (10.21.2000 12:34:43 PM EST) I am so in love with this site! I am still laughing my as* off!

don't think so (0 replies) started by hermozart (10.02.2000 1:32:44 PM EST) Spreading confidential information would be if I released the names of the patients. I dealt with most of the cops in this town in the E/R. Believe me, they have a few stories to tell themselves.

cute (1 reply) started by Chimpmunk343 (09.14.2000 11:36:54 PM EST) I doubt any of theses are true and if they are I hope the asshole that's spreading confidential information gets caught. Hermozart why don't you tell that bullshit to the cops then see what happens.

hey (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (09.13.2000 5:42:00 PM EST) funny

This would be REALLY funny... (4 replies) started by oliverclozoff (09.13.2000 1:10:55 AM EST) ...if any of it actually happened. Can you say "Urban Legends?" Fellow, American Association of Amateur Gynecologists

those were pretty good.... (0 replies) started by SuicideKing (09.13.2000 1:01:29 AM EST) freaky freaks out there, peoples Ryän (the §ui©ideKÏng) "This isn't me, I'm not mechanical...I'm just a boy, playing the suicide king.."

ha ha ha (0 replies)   started by kentster (09.13.2000 0:02:48 AM EST) cool to be here kentster

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