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George W. Bush
 
"I really appreciate the hardworking staff—the docs, the nurses, the people who make this fantastic facility operate in a way that makes me pride, and in a way that will make every American proud when they learn your story. "—Bush, speaking in Washington, D.C., Dec. 18, 2003
 
 

Random Quote
 
"When you sit with a nice girl for two hours you think it's only a minute. But when you sit on a hot stove for a minute you think it's two hours. That's relativity."
— Albert Einstein
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#163 The first penny had the motto "Mind your own business".
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so bald that she took a shower and got brain-washed.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: How can you tell when a man is well hung?
A: When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
 
 

Quick Joke
 
Don't you feel like sitting alone in your home, destroying your belongings while at the same time slowly losing all your household money? Try poker online
 
 


Newspaper headlines

By: FirestormPublished: 03/04/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Newspaper Headlines that will make you chuckle.

1. Something went wrong in Jet crash, expert says
2. Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers
3. Safety experts say school bus passengers should be belted
4. Drunk gets nine months in violin case
5. Iraqi head seeks arms
6. Stud tires out
7. Prostitutes appeal to pope 8. Panda mating fails; Vet takes over
9. Lung cancer in women mushrooms
10. Eye drops off shelf
11. Teachers strike idle kids
12. Squad helps dog bite victim
13. Enraged cows injures farmer with ax
14. Plane too close to ground, crash probe told
15. Minor refuse to work after death
16. Juvenile court to try shooting defendant
17. Stolen painting found by tree
18. Killer sentenced to die for second time in 10 years
19. Drunken drivers paid $1000 in '84
20. War dims hope for peace
21. If strike is settled quickly, it could last a while
22. Red tape holds up new bridge
23. Typhoon rips though cemetery, hundreds killed
24. Kids make nutritious snacks
25. New vaccine may contain rabies

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Mmm.... (0 replies)
started by WeeWifie
(02.08.2001 6:46:42 PM EST)

Good goof

1st (0 replies)  
started by jook
(08.14.2000 1:06:36 AM EST)

I'm First!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In Your Face, assholes!

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