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"I appreciate people's opinions, but I'm more interested in news. And the best way to get the news is from objective sources, and the most objective sources I have are people on my staff who tell me what's happening in the world." —Bush, redefining "objectivity." Source: CNN, "Bush 'Not Paying Attention' to Democratic Race: President Getting His News From Aides," Sept. 23, 2003
 
 

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The World Is Nuts

By: acidintervalPublished: 12/23/2006
 
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In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman's genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only se e their reflection in a mirror.
Do they look different reversed?)

Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick??)

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is ecapitation.
(Much worse than "going blind!")

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the ountryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilage of having sex for the first time.

Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let's just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband's illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)

Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)

In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)

In Maryland, it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only "in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises."
(Is this a great country or what? Well . . . not as great as Guam!)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for this stuff?)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(Is that why Flipper was always smiling?)

The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

(From drinking little bottles of .... ?)
(Did the government pay for this research??)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)

Starfish don't have brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)

And, the best for last:

Turtles can breathe through their butts.
(And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

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    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM THREAD  
    Title: The best one was
    By: thegrandpatron
    Date: 12.23.2006 7:36 AM EST


    Turtles can breathe through their butts.
    (And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

    LMAO

    [ All Posts ] [ Reply ] [ Where You Are ] [ New Thread ]

    Current Thread and Replies
    The best one was    
    started by thegrandpatron
    (12.23.2006 7:36:17 AM EST)


    Turtles can breathe through their butts.
    (And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)

    LMAO


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