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George W. Bush
 
"The law I sign today directs new funds and new focus to the task of collecting vital intelligence on terrorist threats and on weapons of mass production."Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Signs 911 Commission Bill," Nov. 27, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"He wants Texas back."
— Tommy Lasorda, Dodger manager, asked what terms Mexican - born pitching sensation Fernando Valenzuela might settle for in his upcoming contract negotiations. (1981)
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#155 In 1926, the first outdoor mini-golf courses were built on rooftops in NYC.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so slutty that I could've been your daddy, but the guy in line behind me had the correct change.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Did you hear Bill Clinton got a new job in Washington, DC?
A: Hillary hired him to open her mail!
 
 



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Goofball Facts
 
The closest relative to the manatee is the elephant. Scientists believe the elephant crawled back into the sea to become a manatee.
 
 

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