Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"But here in Texas we took [trial lawyers] on and got some good medical—medical malpractice, which evidently had a few loopholes in it." Source: PR Newswire, "Remarks by the President at the Economic Forum Health Care Security Session," Aug. 13, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it'sgoing to be up all night."
— Steven Wright, Comedian
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#202 The mouth of the Statue of Liberty is three feet wide.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
so ugly she could scare a dog off a meat truck.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Why did Raggedy Ann get thrown out of the toy box?
A: She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face, and moaning, "Lie to me!"
 
 


The Bronze Statue

By: marvinPublished: 05/23/2003
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco's Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner the price.

"Twelve dollars for the rat, sir," said the shop owner, "And an extra thousand for the story behind it."

"At that price, you can keep the story," he replies, "But I'll take the bronze rat."

The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him.

Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer, more rats come out and follow him. By the time he's walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot as multitudes of rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots, and abandoned cars... following him.

Rats by the thousands are at his heels, and as he sees the waterfront at the bottom of the hill he panics and starts to run full tilt.

No matter how fast he runs, the rats keep up, squealing hideously now not just thousands but millions, so that by the time he comes racing to the water's edge a trail of rats twelve blocks long is behind him.

Making a mighty leap, he jumps up onto a lamp post, grasping it with one arm, while he hurls the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay as far as he can throw it.

Pulling his legs up and clinging to the post, he watches in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the breakwater into the sea, where they drown.

Shaken and mumbling, he makes his way back to the antique shop.

"Ah sir, you've come back for the story," said the owner.

"No," sid the tourist, "I was just hoping you had a bronze sculpture of a lawyer"

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Police Shoot Monster Rat
  • Rat Hole
  • Rat trap
  • Rat Face!
  • Rat Trap
  • Toilet Rat
  • Poor Rat
  • Two Faced Rat Bastard
  • Hung Like A Rat
  • The Cat And The Rat
  • Rats On The Catwalk
  • Raining Like Rats And Dogs
  • Bronzed Brooke
  • Rowdy Rats
  • Horny Little Rats
  • Anal Sex Euphemisms
  • Stupid News Clips
  • You must be either white trash, a redneck, or a resident of Arkansas, if...
  • Great Jump Shot
  • Singing In The Rain

  • More Lawyer Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    lol (0 replies)
    started by bigjohn2
    (05.23.2003 7:39:18 AM EST)

    ^5

    Just Gimme (0 replies)
    started by marvin
    (05.23.2003 3:26:06 AM EST)

    Charles DeGaulle !

    (Fantastic joke Marvin, you're the one! Great stuff buddy! Lots of 5^s for ya) Hehehehehehehehe

    Kiss My Ass ;-)

    I'll take....... (0 replies)
    started by tjshere
    (05.23.2003 2:01:01 AM EST)

    One of my boss.

    my schween is small but my tongue is mighty!

    Can I get one (0 replies)  
    started by roger
    (05.23.2003 0:57:02 AM EST)


    of a cat?


    hahahahahaha


    Just protecting my sheep

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Dumb Lawyer
    Murphy, a dishonest lawyer, bribed one of his client's ...
    09.01.2008

    Lawyer Jokes
    The Post Office just recalled their latest stamps ...
    08.15.2008

    New Porsche
    A very successful lawyer parked his brand new Porsche ...
    02.01.2008

    You Can't Take It With You
    Trying to disprove the saying "You can't take it with ...
    01.24.2008

    Rate This!

    3.50 Goofballs of 5
    8 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Heaven Vs. Hell
    An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not ...
    10.24.2007

    Don't Mess With Farmers
    A lawyer went duck hunting in rural Arkansas. He shot ...
    07.16.2007

    Deathbed Lawyer
    An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death ...
    03.31.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Two People
    A woman and her young daughter were visiting the grave ...
    11.05.2006

    Attorney Privilege
    The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather ...
    10.03.2006

    Dinner At The Lawyers
    One afternoon a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass ...
    08.24.2006

    Two Lawyers
    Two lawyers had been stranded on a desert island for ...
    08.18.2006

    Lookie Here!
    The Spy Who Shagged Me

    Goofball Facts
     
    Ivory bar soap floating was a mistake. They had been over mixing the soap formula causing excess air bubbles that made it float. Customers wrote and told how much they loved that it floated, and it has floated ever since.