A woman who had been twice married and divorced was fed up. Her
first husband was violent, and her second husband ran off with
another woman.
Plus, she couldn't find a new lover
who could satisfy her
sexually; so, she put an add in the classifieds:
"Wanted: a good looking, single guy who won't abuse me, won't leave me, and is good in bed."
About a week later, her doorbell rings. She opens the door to find a man with no arms or legs on her front porch.
"I'm here about your ad", he offers.
"You must be mistaken", she begins to reply.
"Let me explain", he interjects. "I can't beat you, because I don't have any arms; I can't run off, because I don't have any
legs."
"But", she demands, "how do I know you're good in bed?"
"I rang the doorbell didn't I?"