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George W. Bush
 
"A lame duck session, for people who don't know what that means, it means the Senate is coming and the House is coming back between now and Christmas and they've got a few days to get some big things done."Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "President Bush Holds Press Conference, Presidential Hall, Dwight D. Eisenhower Executive Office Building," Nov. 7, 2002
 
 

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"I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence, There's a knob called brightness, but it doesn't work."
— Eugene P. Gallagher
 
 

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#161 The first TV network kids show in the U.S. was "Captain Kangaroo".
 
 

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is so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio
 
 

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Q: What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom?
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Tips on love by kids age 5-10.

By: UnknownPublished: 05/07/2000
 
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WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?
"Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife." (Tom, 5)

WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?
"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." (Mike, 9)

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?
"You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a big ring and her own VCR, cause she'll want to have videos of the wedding." (Jim, 10)

CONCERNING WHY LOVE HAPPENS BETWEEN TWO PARTICULAR PEOPLE:
"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That's why perfume and deoderant are so popular." (Jan, 9)

ON WHAT FALLING IN LOVE IS LIKE:
"Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life." (Roger, 9)
"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." (Leo, 7)

ON THE ROLE OF GOOD LOOKS IN LOVE:
"If you want to be loved by somebody who isn't already in your family, it doesn't hurt to be beautiful." (Jeanne, 8)
"It isn't always just how you look. Look at me, I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet." (Gary, 7)
"Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time." (Christine, 9)

CONCERNING WHY LOVERS OFTEN HOLD HANDS:
"They want to make sure their rings don't fall off because they paid good money for them." (Dave, 8)

CONFIDENTIAL OPINIONS ABOUT LOVE:
"I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'The Simpsons' is on television." (Anita, 6)
"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I have been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." (Bobby, 8)
"I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough." (Regina, 10)

THE PERSONAL QUALITIES NECESSARY TO BE A GOOD LOVER:
"One of you should know how to write a check. Because even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." (Ava, 8)

SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU:
"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." (Alonzo, 9)
"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually work for me." (Bart, 9)

WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU"
"The person is thinking, Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day." (michelle,9)

HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE:
"Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work." (Tom, 7)
"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash." (Randy,8)

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WOAH joanna miller (0 replies)
started by smurfcream
(06.21.2001 5:29:28 PM EST)

sorry sweetheart, but at 13 you ain't anywhere near being a woman yet. this website is not offensive, and if you don't like it, don't look at it dumbass! noone forced you to go on here.

cool (0 replies)
started by nicklass
(06.09.2001 5:30:20 PM EST)

that was one of the coolest things i read

this is funny (0 replies)
started by hotgurl88
(05.30.2001 6:04:08 PM EST)

this is funny stuff

hi, I just wanted to say a few things (2 replies)
started by sajdkhaskdhk
(05.24.2001 9:41:29 PM EST)

first of all, I think your website sucks. I am a woman, and the website if very offensive to women. You have porn pics of women, and I cannot lie to the fact that a woman's body is better than a man's, but guys get enough porn. They should not see the female body, and I think all women who pose nude are fucking sluts and whores for being so okay with showing off their breats and vaginas. Also, please stop calling vaginas pussies, it is offensive. and dont call breasts tits. I think your website should get taken off for some offensive material. I just wanted to say it is dumb.

screw you,

Joanna Miller age 13

Sminkette

thats funny, (0 replies)
started by NSMC
(11.11.2000 6:50:44 PM EST)

thats cute

Too cute (0 replies)
started by jessicanicole
(11.08.2000 2:47:17 PM EST)

Most of these kids just seem so young to have such close ideas about how a relationship works!!

tascojm (0 replies)
started by tascojm
(10.14.2000 4:33:11 PM EST)

if these kids keep these thoughts thru life ,this world will have a chance.

First again! (0 replies)  
started by crazed
(08.24.2000 9:49:41 PM EST)

This joke was really stupid, but I only read it to be first!

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