To Have And To Hold?
By: Robnoxious	Published: 09/21/2000
A Corvette is pulled over for speeding. At the wheel is a late-40's guy and in the other bucket seat is his wife, quietly crocheting an afghan. The officer says, "I clocked you at 80 mph, sir." The driver says, "Sorry, officer, I had it on cruise control set at 65, perhaps your radar needs calibrating." Not looking up from her afghan, his wife says sweetly, "Now don't be silly dear, you know very well this car doesn't even have cruise control." As the officer makes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you keep your mouth shut for once?" The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful that your radar detector went off when it did." As the officer makes out a second ticket for the illegal radar detector, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Woman, shut your mouth! NOW!" The officer frowns and says, "And, I notice you're not wearing your seat belt, sir, that's an automatic $75 fine." The driver says, "Yeah, well you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over to get my license out of my back pocket." The wife says, "Now dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on, you never wear your seat belt when you're driving the Corvette." And, as the officer makes out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU JUST SHUT UP!" The officer looks over at the woman and says, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?" "Oh heavens no, officer, only when he's been drinking. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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zyxwv isa stupid cunt (0 replies) started by punanimuncher (10.08.2000 11:15:48 AM EST) You doss cunt. The wife is just stupid she doesn't have a reason to put her husband up shit creek. This is just typical of the average yank! Thick fuck. Blood, guts, guns, cuts, knives, lives, wives, nuns, sluts.

This could be us!!! (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (10.01.2000 8:09:25 PM EST) jJust thought I would make you smile seeings how I've been slacking in that area lately!!! In spite of all my shittiness lately, THANK-YOU FOR BEING THERE FOR ME!!! LOVE YOU ALWAYS!!! LEX

Thanks (0 replies) started by poolguy (09.28.2000 5:05:52 PM EST) Thankyou for the joke it was a good one please send more.

Where's the punchline? (0 replies) started by zyxwv (09.26.2000 11:41:26 AM EST) This joke isn't complete. As it is, there's no reason for the woman to keep telling the cop incriminating info about her husband. It needs a punchline to explain why she's trying to get him in trouble. (Like she caught him with him mistress, or they're just coming from divorce proceedings and she's trying to make him look bad, stuff like that.) Without it, I have to agree with the folks below: this joke is stupid. The artist formerly known as "Anonymous Frog"

Cop-Hater (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (09.22.2000 6:02:11 PM EST) Excuse me occifer, Hic! Here's a dollar. Go buy your self a Fucking Dognut, Stupid!

heh...hey bitch, get out of the car... (0 replies) started by SuicideKing (09.22.2000 1:55:34 AM EST) you're walking home R¥äñ (the §üîçïÐê Kïñg) "When I go out, I'ma go out shootin' I don't mean when I die, I mean when I go out to the club, stupid!"

Yeah, I'm with the Canuck... (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (09.21.2000 11:53:55 AM EST) I hope the by-line only means you submitted, because I doubt you wrote this old joke. p.s.: I may be "with" the Canuck on this so-called joke, but I am fully clothed. :-)

ugh (0 replies) started by NakedCanuck (09.21.2000 10:29:07 AM EST) What a contrived story... Rob, did you make this one up yourself? The Naked CanuckEverybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

Narf! (0 replies) started by msbzdragn (09.21.2000 0:19:40 AM EST) This joke sucks it, big time. squid

Three tickets? (0 replies)   started by oliverclozoff (09.21.2000 0:10:39 AM EST) She better hope she can make those shoes last another five years. Take time to stop and smell the panties.

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