"I was a prisoner too, but for bad reasons." - To Argentine President Nestor Kirchner, on being told that all but one of the Argentine delegates to a summit meeting were imprisoned during the military dictatorship, Monterrey, Mexico, Jan. 13, 2004
Random Quote
"Homosexuality is God's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children." — Sam Austin
Snapple Facts
#38 Fish cough.
Yo Mama ...
... is so fat, Every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
One Liners
Q. What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? A. Doughnuts.
The wife was busy frying eggs, when her husband came home. He walked into the kitchen and immediately started yelling.
"Careful...CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! WE NEED MORE BUTTER! THEY ARE GOING TO STICK! CAREFUL! CAREFUL!!! TURN THEM! HURRY UP!!! ARE YOU CRAZY!!! USE MORE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!!"
The wife was very upset, "What is wrong with you? Why are you yelling like this? Do you think I don't know how to fry an egg?"
The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like for me when I am driving with you sitting next to me."
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