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Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
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George W. Bush |
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"We're expediting the administrative appeals process, so that disputes over projects are resolved quickly. In other words, not everybody agrees with thinning, there will objections. But we want those objections to be heard, of course—every citizen needs to hear a voice." —Bush, hearing voices in Summerhaven, Ariz. Source: The White House, "President Bush Promotes Healthy Forests in Arizona," Aug. 11, 2003
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Random Quote |
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"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
—David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.
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Snapple Facts |
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#187 There are over 61,000 pizzerias in the U.S.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is in a wheelchair screaming "I AIN'T STANDING FOR THIS SHIT"
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One Liners |
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Q. How is Bin Laden like Fred Flintstone?
A. They both look out their window and see Rubble.
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 Died A Virgin | | By: bd2son | Published: 12/06/2004 | | |  |
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In a tiny village on the Irish coast lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin and very proud of it. Realizing that her final days were rapidly approaching, she told the local, part-time postal clerk, part-time undertaker, that she wanted the following inscription engraved on her tombstone:
BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED AS A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
Not long after, the old maid died peacefully. The undertaker then went to carve the inscription that she had requested. It was then that he realized that the tombstone she had selected was much too small for the wording that she had chosen. He thought long and hard as to how he could fulfill the old maid's final request with such limited space available to him. After agonizing over this dilemma for days, inspiration finally came to him, and the following inscription was carved into her tombstone: "RETURNED UNOPENED." Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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Who Has Died Lately?
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| Lookie Here!
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Goofball Facts |
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Aerosmith's "Dude Looks Like a Lady" was written about Vince Neil of Motley Crue.
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An end with horror is better than horror without end.
