Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"Neither in French nor in English nor in Mexican." -George W. Bush, declining to take reporters' questions during a photo op with Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chretien, April 21, 2001
 
 

Random Quote
 
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
— Jack Nicholson
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#8 A bee has 5 eyes.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, She's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
 
 


A Retired Man's Points On An Aging Women

By: luvly1Published: 08/28/2007
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there’s nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Jim. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Peggy. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Peggy to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.

Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don’t yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men’s Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I’m ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door. She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it’s not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner.

I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won’t clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take ‘em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it outover two or even three days. That way she won’t have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn’t hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I’m a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Peggy. I’m not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

Jim

EDITOR’S NOTE:

Jim died suddenly on May 27 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a sledge hammer laying nearby.

His wife Peggy was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Jim somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • What I'm Doing Now That I'm Retired
  • Retired
  • Wilson Has Retired
  • Knowing Where To Put It
  • Rertired And Looking To The Future
  • Be Discreet
  • Talking Frog
  • Sleeping Pills
  • You Look A Little Orange
  • Digital Gift Surprises Museum
  • 105-year-old ordered to school
  • Fresh Fish Fall on English Town
  • Beaver Doctor
  • My Sexercise Machine
  • Vigilante Granny
  • Second Career
  • Worker Wins Compensation For Being Promoted
  • Dear Dr Phil
  • Paid By The Inch
  • Fringe Benefits

  • More Men / Women Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    A tragic shame! (0 replies)  
    started by ajk454
    (08.30.2007 4:31:47 PM EST)

    He sounded like such a reasonable and understanding husband. What more could she ask for? The wench!

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    What's In A Name?
    A woman scanned the guests at a party and spotted ...
    05.11.2008

    Seducing The Male
    Three women: one engaged, one married, and one a mistress, ...
    05.02.2008

    Ther Hired Hand
    The banker saw his old friend Tom, an eighty-year-old rancher ...
    04.14.2008

    Flying A Kite
    A husband in his back yard is trying to fly a kite. ...
    04.12.2008

    Rate This!

    3.73 Goofballs of 5
    11 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    New Haircut: Men vs Women
    Woman2: Oh! You got a haircut! ...
    05.08.2007

    ATM's - Male Vs. Female
    A sign in the local Bank Lobby reads: "Please note ...
    05.06.2007

    Mathematics
    Smart man + smart woman = romance
    05.05.2007

    Hillbilly Honeymoon
    Two hicks from West Virginia got married and were ...
    05.04.2007

    Two Years Ago
    A British Company Implants
    A British company is developing computer chips that ...
    05.11.2006

    Who Do I Look Like?
    There was a young couple living in an old run down ...
    05.10.2006

    A Sharing Marriage
    He ordered one hamburger, one order of French fries ...
    05.01.2006

    Pancakes
    Brenda and Steve took their six-year-old son to the ...
    04.30.2006

    Lookie Here!
    The New Yorker 75th Anniversary Cartoon Collection

    Goofball Facts
     
    Pearls will dissolve in vinegar!