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George W. Bush
 
"I'm a uniter not a divider. That means when it comes time to sew up your chest cavity, we use stitches as opposed to opening it up." -- Bush, on David Letterman, March 2, 2000. (the audience booed)
 
 

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"First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic club. And second, what can I say? I'm a night owl."
— Marion Barry, Mayor of Washington, DC
 
 

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#140 Holland is the only country with a national dog.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so nasty the bitches teeth look like she got jumped by the Cavity Creeps!!!
 
 

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Q: Why do the Alabama cheerleaders wear bibs?
A: To keep the tobacco juice off their uniforms.
 
 


Thoughtful Sarcasms for the Thoughtless...

By: DirkSteelePublished: 05/17/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
Well, this date was a total waste of makeup.
For you, personal growth is obviously an erection.
This isn't an office … It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.
I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cats.
Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe?
Of course I am interested in your crybaby whiny-assed opinion.
Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.
Do I look like a fucking people person?
See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.
Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.
With home shopping, pizza delivery and a vibrator, why would I ever want to leave the house?
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
Not all men are annoying... Some are in prison.
Did I mention the kick in the groin you'll be receiving if you touch me?
It's not the size, it's... Actually, it is the size!
A woman's favorite position is CEO.
A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.
Can I trade this job for what's behind bathroom door 1?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
Okay, okay, I take it back! Un-screw you!
Nice perfume... But must you marinate in it?
And which dwarf are you?
How do I set the laser printer to stun?
Too many freaks, not enough circuses.
Chaos, panic and disorder... My work here is done.

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where are the cards (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(05.17.2001 11:52:49 AM EST)

thanks

First (0 replies)  
started by mitar
(05.25.2000 10:32:13 AM EST)

First!!!!

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