Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"Redefining the role of the United States from enablers to keep the peace to enablers to keep the peace from peacekeepers is going to be an assignment." -George W. Bush, Jan. 2001
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I never deliberatelt tried to hurt anyone except if it was important, like in a game."
— Dick Butkus
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#24 The state of maine has 62 lighthouses.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, She's got Amtrak tattooed on her leg!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
A. 45 lbs.
 
 


The Bullemic St. Bernard

By: RobnoxiousPublished: 11/21/2001
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

It's 2 in the morning and the travelling salesman calls the front desk at his motel and asks for some female company but with certain physical characteristics.

"She's got to be taller than 6 ft. and weigh no more than 100 lbs.," he tells the desk clerk. Thirty minutes later, there's a knock on his door and he opens it to see a tall, lithe young lady.

"I'm here for your pleasure, sir," she says.

"What do you weigh and how tall are you?"

She replies, "6'2 and 97 lbs."

"Perfect," he says. "Now take off all your clothes and get down on all fours on the floor."

As she does this, he walks to the bathroom door, opens it and ushers in a big St. Bernard dog.

The dog looks at the girl and the girl looks at the dog and the salesman says, "Now Fritz, do you see what you're going to look like if you don't finish your damned dinner!?"

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Where my dog?
  • Airplane Dog
  • My Dog Rules
  • A Dog Named Sex
  • Walk The Dog
  • Dog Learns To Sort Mail
  • Dog Gets Unique Memorial
  • Dog Freezer Lands In Jail
  • Dog Coughs Up a Couple of Karats
  • Dog Enlightened During a Walk in the Park
  • Catholic Dog
  • Burlington Recalls Dog Fur Coats
  • Dog Survives 24 Hours Buried In Avalanche
  • Thieves Snort a Line Of Dog
  • Poor Dog
  • New Trial for Junk Food Felon
  • Flying Doghouse, Complete With Dog
  • Hunter Loses Eye To Rifle-Firing Dog
  • Food For Thought
  • Bizarre Food Related Town Names

  • More Miscellaneous Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    St. Bernard replies: (0 replies)
    started by willi
    (11.21.2001 3:50:31 PM EST)

    "I'm eatin' just fine, buddy. If my ass was as bony as hers, you'd have some ugly ass bruises on your pelvic region!"

    A Paws for thought (0 replies)  
    started by marvin
    (11.21.2001 2:18:56 AM EST)

    Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm - but was the woman a dog ?

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Pillsbury Dough Boy Dead At 71
    Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N. Fresh, died ...
    10.07.2008

    One Fast Moped
    An elderly man on a Moped, looking about 100 years ...
    10.02.2008

    Weddingsþ
    When I was younger I hated going to weddings ...
    10.01.2008

    The Haircut
    A man was getting a haircut prior to a trip to Rome. ...
    09.27.2008

    Rate This!

    2.83 Goofballs of 5
    6 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Not Happy
    This morning on the way to work I rear-ended a car at a stop light while not really paying attention.
    10.01.2007

    Further Clarification Unnecessary
    My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so ...
    09.28.2007

    Potentially Dangereous Situation: Question
    You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a drop off (The ground is 18-20 inches below the level you are traveling on), and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is another galloping horse. Both horses are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this potentially highly dangerous situation?
    09.26.2007

    What The Teacher Says And (what The Teacher Means)
    1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering ...
    09.25.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Grandma's Boyfriend
    A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one ...
    10.06.2006

    It's Good To Be A Senior
    No one believes seniors . . . everyone thinks they ...
    10.05.2006

    Symptoms Of Bird Flu
    The Center for Disease Control has released a list ...
    10.04.2006

    A Love Story
    I will seek and find you ...
    10.02.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Dilbert Gives You the ...

    Goofball Facts
     
    A raisin dropped into a glass of fresh champagne will rise and fall continuously!