The Science Diet
By: marvin	Published: 12/21/2002
We all know that it takes one calorie to heat one gram of water one degree celsius. Translated into meaningful terms, this means that if you eat a very cold dessert (generally consisting of water in large part), the natural processes which raise the consumed dessert to body temperature during the digestive cycle literally sucks the calories out of the only available source, your body fat. For example, a dessert served and eaten near 0 degrees C (32.2 deg.F) will in a short time be raised to the normal body temperature of 37 degrees C (98.6 deg. F). For each gram of dessert eaten, that process takes approximately 37 calories as stated above. The average dessert portion is 6 oz, or 168 grams. Therefore, by operation of thermodynamic law, 6,216 calories (1 cal./gm/deg. x 37 deg. x 168 gms) are extracted from body fat as the dessert's temperature is normalized. Allowing for the 1,200 latent calories in the dessert, the net calorie loss is approximately 5,000 calories. Obviously, the more cold dessert you eat, the better off you are and the faster you will lose weight, if that is your goal. This process works equally well when drinking very cold beer in frosted glasses. Each ounce of beer contains 16 latent calories, but extracts 1,036 calories (6,216 cal. per 6 oz. portion) in the temperature normalizing process. Thus the net calorie loss per ounce of beer is 1,020 calories. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to calculate that 12,240 calories (12oz. x 1,020 cal./oz.) are extracted from the body in the process of drinking a can of beer. Frozen desserts, e.g., ice cream, are even more beneficial, since it takes 83 cal./gm to melt them (i.e., raise them to 0 deg. C) and an additional 37 cal./gm to further raise them to body temperature. The results here are really remarkable, and it beats running hands down. Unfortunately, for those who eat pizza as an excuse to drink beer, pizza (loaded with latent calories and served above body temperature) induces an opposite effect. But, thankfully, as the astute reader should have already reasoned, the obvious solution is to drink a lot of beer with pizza, and follow up immediately with large bowls of ice cream. We should all be thin very soon if we adhere religiously to this cold pizza, cold beer, and ice cream diet. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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that would be true except...... (0 replies) started by oxbrain (04.11.2003 4:15:08 AM EST) see, theres only one problem with your theory, granted, it would be nice to have something like that be true, 1 calorie does indeed heat one gram 1 degree celcius, but, calories listed in food are KiloCals, hence, the large C in front of them, so for every calorie you see listed on a foor container, it is actually, 1000 calories, therefore, with that 5000 calorie net loss, its actually, 5000 calories taken away from 1,200,000.....in other words were all Sh*t outta luck "Wank on. Wank off."

that would be true except...... (0 replies) started by oxbrain (04.11.2003 4:13:39 AM EST) see, theres only one problem with your theory, granted, it would be nice to have something like that be true, 1 calorie does indeed heat one gram 1 degree celcius, but, calories listed in food are KiloCals, hence, the large C in front of them, so for every calorie you see listed on a foor container, it is actually, 1000 calories, therefore, with that 5000 calorie net loss, its actually, 5000 calories taken away from 1,200,000.....in other words were all Shit outta luck "Wank on. Wank off."

That's a gem of a joke (0 replies) started by marvin (12.21.2002 3:15:42 PM EST) or is that a "joule" of a joke ? Hahahahahahahaha So what's wrong with this idea, why doesn't it work ?

we all know??? (0 replies) started by tjshere (12.21.2002 11:26:45 AM EST) "It takes one calorie to heat one gram of water one degree celsius." I didn't know that. I guess you could say this is food for thought. Hehehe. Cheers!

lol well all I'm doing is drinking beer (0 replies)   started by suicideking (12.21.2002 2:00:40 AM EST) 9 and counting, so let's hear it for losing weight...and it's Labatt Blue Light too, so it's all about losing the poundage ;) §Üî©ìÐéK‡ñG Sorry kids, I killed Santa..

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