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Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
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George W. Bush |
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"The recession started upon my arrival. It could have been - some say February, some say March, some speculate maybe earlier it started - but nevertheless, it happened as we showed up here. The attacks on our country affected our economy. Corporate scandals affected the confidence of people and therefore affected the economy. My decision on Iraq, this kind of march to war, affected the economy." - Meet the Press, Feb. 8, 2004
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Random Quote |
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"As the French say, there are three sexes-men, women and clergymen."
— Rev. Sydney Smith
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Snapple Facts |
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#37 A snail breathes through it's foot.
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Yo Mama ... |
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... is so fat, Her legs are like spoiled milk - white and chunky!
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One Liners |
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Q. What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
A. One US leader.
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 Amazing Talking Dog | | By: portajon | Published: 12/28/2003 | | |  |
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This guy sees a sign in front of a house "Talking Dog for Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the back yard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a mutt sitting there. "You talk?" he asks.
"So, what's your story?"
The mutt looks up and says "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, cause no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. The jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down. So I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals. Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. The owner says "Ten dollars." The guy says he'll buy him but asks the owner, "This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him?".
The owner replies, "He's such a frigin liar!" Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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Goofball Facts |
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One 75-watt bulb gives more light than three 25-watt bulbs.
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