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Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
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George W. Bush |
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"And then we'll be going to Goree Island, where I'll be giving a speech about race, race in the world, race as it relates to Africa and America. And we're in the process of writing it. I can't give you any highlights of the speech yet because I, frankly, haven't seen it." —Bush, discussing preparations for his trip to Africa Source: White House, "President Bush Discusses Upcoming Africa Trip with Reporters Remarks by the President in Roundtable Interview with African Print Journalists," July 3, 2003
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Random Quote |
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"I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats onthem. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles."
— Steven Wright, Comedian
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Snapple Facts |
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#214 Giraffes can link their own eyes.
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Yo Mama ... |
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so ugly she tried to take a bath and the water jumped out.
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One Liners |
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Q: Why do men die before their wives?
A: They want to.
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 Tough Duty | | By: bd2son | Published: 08/15/2004 | | |  |
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A US Air Force C-141 was scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland at midnight. During the pilot's preflight check, he discovered that the aircraft's latrine holding tank was still full from the last flight. So a message was sent to the base, and an airman who was off duty is called out to take care of it.
The young man finally got to the air base and made his way to the aircraft, only to find that the latrine pump truck had been left outdoors and was frozen solid, so he had to find another one in the hangar, which takes even more time. He returned to the aircraft and was less than enthusiastic about what he had to do. Nevertheless, he went about the pumping job deliberately and carefully (and slowly) so as to not risk criticism later.
As he left the plane, the pilot stopped him and said, "Son, your attitude and performance has caused this flight to be late, and I'm going to personally see to it that you are not just reprimanded, but punished."
Shivering in the cold, his task finished, the airman took a deep breath, stood up tall and said, "Sir, with all due respect, I'm not your son; I'm an Airman in the United States Air Force. I've been in Thule, Greenland for 11 months without any leave, and the reindeer are beginning to look pretty good to me. I have one stripe, it's two-thirty in the morning, the temperature is 40 degrees below zero and my job here is to pump crap from your aircraft. Now just exactly what form of punishment did you have in mind?" Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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Goofball Facts |
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In most advertisments, including newspapers, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10 because then the hands of the watch frame the brand name on the watch face.
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