Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"I am the master of low expectations." Source: Agence France Presse, "Bush Says Middle East Summit 'Met Expectations'," June 4, 2003
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I think pop music has done more for oral intercourse than anything else that has ever happened, and vice versa."
—Frank Zappa
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#189 The Sahara Desert stretches father than the distance from California to New York.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
house so small her washcloth makes wall-to-wall carpeting.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
A: Wiped his ass.
 
 


Tragedy Or Reality

By: bd2sonPublished: 08/18/2005
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

While walking down the street one day a politician is tragically hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the man.

"Well, I'd like to but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose were to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.

"I'm sorry but we have our rules."

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middl! e of a green golf course. In the distance is a club and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress.

They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people.

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne.

Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that, before he realizes it, it is time to go.

Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises.

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit heaven."

So, 24 hours pass with the politician joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a! good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity."

The politician reflects for a minute, then answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell.

Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags.

The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.

"I don't understand," stammers the politician. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"

The devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning......

Today you voted"

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Tragedy Defined
  • The Definition of Tragedy
  • Sheer Tragedy
  • Jesse Jackson
  • Church bulletins
  • Ethics Test
  • Photo Shoot Gives Nudist Swelled Head
  • TV Commercial Leads To Tragic Cycle
  • Russian Woman Blows Chance For Breakfast in Bed
  • Russian Woman Blows Chance For Breakfast in Bed
  • Island Paradise
  • Elian Island
  • Darwin Award: Fishman
  • Anagrams
  • Madness

  • More Miscellaneous Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    I really liked it (0 replies)
    started by tjshere
    (08.18.2005 12:58:43 PM EST)


    But Ol' Yeller is ROTF!

    my schween is small but my tongue is mighty!

    HEY! (0 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (08.18.2005 6:58:48 AM EST)


    We aren't suppose to hear that joke but every 4 years.
    Is it an election year already?


    editor's note:
    It was a funny joke,
    I'm just sad it's to close to the truth.

    Awesome Joke! (0 replies)  
    started by j9nh
    (08.18.2005 6:09:24 AM EST)

    Thanks, BD! I loved it!

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Unknown Chinese Proverbs
    Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
    11.17.2008

    Suicide Hotline
    Iwas depressed last night so, I called Lifeline.....
    11.14.2008

    Words And Alcohol
    Things that are difficult to say when drunk ...
    11.11.2008

    Mick Jagger's Frog
    A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. ...
    10.09.2008

    Rate This!

    4.09 Goofballs of 5
    11 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Don't You Just Love Engrish?
    Doctors' office, Rome: "SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER ...
    11.19.2007

    Thoughts For The Weekend
    Wouldn't it be nice if ...
    11.17.2007

    Nurse
    A nurse walks into a bank totally exhausted after ...
    11.06.2007

    10 Year Old Blues
    A father asked his 10-year old son if he knew about ...
    10.29.2007

    Two Years Ago
    The Blind Bat
    A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered ...
    12.04.2006

    Vocabulary Lesson Of The Day
    The Washington Post's Style Invitational asked readers ...
    12.03.2006

    Beat That Ghost
    A man is in the hospital for tests, the last of which leaves his intestines very upset ...
    11.29.2006

    Costello Calls To Buy A Computer From Abbott
    If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their ...
    11.25.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Austin Powers: International Man of...

    Goofball Facts
     
    Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr were the two left-handed Beatles.