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Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
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George W. Bush |
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"I mean, these good folks are revolutionizing how businesses conduct their business. And, like them, I am very optimistic about our position in the world and about its influence on the United States. We're concerned about the short-term economic news, but long-term I'm optimistic. And so, I hope investors, you know - secondly, I hope investors hold investments for periods of time - that I've always found the best investments are those that you salt away based on economics." - Austin, Texas, Jan. 4, 2001
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Random Quote |
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"Guys aren't albe to get $15 or $20 million [a year] anymore, so you have to play for the love of the game."
— Orlando Magic star Penny Hardaway, bemoaning the NBA's new salary cap
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Snapple Facts |
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#74 You share your birthday with 9 million others in the world.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so fat she stands in two time zones.
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One Liners |
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Q. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A. A nervous wreck.
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 Talented Dog | | By: bd2son | Published: 04/01/2007 | | |  |
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Tim O'Rourke was walking his Irish Setter in the country side. He picked up a stick and threw it, the dog went and retrieved it and brought it back. Tim then threw it in a different direction and the dog once again went and retrieved it and brought it back. Tim then threw it in another direction and it landed in a small lake. The dog went down to the water's edge, walked across the water, picked up the stick and brought it back.
Well, Tim was astounded. He couldn't believe what he had seen and threw stick in the lake again, and the dog once again walked across the water to bring the stick back. As he went into town, he promised that he would show his dog's wonderful new trick to the first person he came across.
Once in town the first person the dog owner came across was the town drunk Declan Dunphy. Tim dragged Declan to the lake to show him what his dog could do. Once again, the dog owner threw the stick into the small lake and the dog went to the water's edge, walked across the water, picked up the stick and brought it back to it's owner.
Once the drunk saw that, he turned to the dog owner and said; "Why that's great, mister! But when are you going to teach your dog how to swim?" Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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More Miscellaneous Jokes...
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| Section Features
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| One Year Ago
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Not Happy
This morning on the way to work I rear-ended a car at a stop light while not really paying attention.
10.01.2007
Further Clarification Unnecessary
My neighbor found out her dog could hardly hear so ...
09.28.2007
Potentially Dangereous Situation: Question
You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a drop off (The ground is 18-20 inches below the level you are traveling on), and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is another galloping horse. Both horses are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this potentially highly dangerous situation?
09.26.2007
What The Teacher Says And (what The Teacher Means)
1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering ...
09.25.2007
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| Two Years Ago
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| Lookie Here!
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Goofball Facts |
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The shallow champagne glass was first formed from wax molds of Marie Antoinette's breasts.
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