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George W. Bush
 
"The recession started upon my arrival. It could have been - some say February, some say March, some speculate maybe earlier it started - but nevertheless, it happened as we showed up here. The attacks on our country affected our economy. Corporate scandals affected the confidence of people and therefore affected the economy. My decision on Iraq, this kind of march to war, affected the economy." - Meet the Press, Feb. 8, 2004
 
 

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"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
— Woody Allen
 
 

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#38 Fish cough.
 
 

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... is so fat, Every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil!
 
 

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Q. What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?
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Don't you feel like sitting alone in your home, destroying your belongings while at the same time slowly losing all your household money? Try poker online
 
 


The Blind Leading The Blind

By: marrakeshmanPublished: 08/04/2008
 
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Women who are out walking their dogs meet on a street corner. One says to the other, "Boy it sure is hot today. I'd really like to go into the bar and get a beer, but the sign on the front door says, "No Pets Allowed," and I can't leave Fido alone on the street."

The other man replies, "No problem, just stand by the door and watch me, and you'll be having that beer real soon!" The second man reaches into his pocket and puts on a pair of dark sunglasses, and then walks into the bar.

The bartender looks up and says, "Hey buddy, you can't bring that dog in here!" The man says, "But I'm blind, and this is my seeing-eye dog!" The bartender says, "Oh, okay then." The man drinks his beer and leaves.

The first man then puts on dark sunglasses and goes into the bar. The bartender looks up and says, "Hey buddy, you can't bring that dog in here!" The man says, "But I'm blind, and this is my seeing-eye dog!"

The bartender says, "Oh really? I've never heard of a Chihuahua seeing-eye dog!"

The man, thinking quickly, blurts out, "Oh, man! You mean they gave me a Chihuahua?"

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