"But I also made it clear to (Vladimir Putin) that it's important to think beyond the old days of when we had the concept that if we blew each other up, the world would be safe." -George W. Bush, May 1, 2001
Random Quote
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL." — Lynn Lavner
Snapple Facts
#6 A honey bee can fly at 15mph.
Yo Mama ...
... is so fat, All the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama"
One Liners
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
The college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and that there would
be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Those were a medically certifiable illness or a death in the student's immediate family.
A student in the back of the classroom waved his hand and spoke up. "But what about extreme sexual exhaustion, professor?" As you would expect, the class exploded in laughter. When the students had finally settled down, the professor froze the young man with a glaring look.
"Well," he responded, "I guess you'll just have to learn to write with your
other hand."
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Golf Club Sign Here is an actual sign posted at a golf club in Scotland ...
10.12.2009
