"A year ago, I did give the speech from the carrier, saying that we had achieved an important objective, that we'd accomplished a mission, which was the removal of Saddam Hussein. And as a result, there are no longer torture chambers or rape rooms or mass graves in Iraq." —Bush, remarks in the Rose Garden, April 30, 2004
Random Quote
"Public speaking is very easy." — Senator Dan Quayle to reporters in 10/88
Snapple Facts
#150 The first sport to be filmed was boxing in 1894.
Yo Mama ...
is like a bus: Guys climb on and off her all day long.
One Liners
Q: How many Vietnam vets does it take to change a light bulb? A: You don't know, maaan! You weren't there!
1. You let your 14-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
2. The Blue Book value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.
3. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
4. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
5. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
6. Someone in your family died right after saying, "Hey, y'all, watch this."
7. You think Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.
8. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
9. Your junior prom offered day care.
10. You think the last words of the "Star-Spangled Banner" are "Gentlemen, start your engines".
11. You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.
12. The Halloween pumpkin on your porch has more teeth than your spouse.
13. You have to go outside to get something from the fridge.
14. One of your kids was born on a pool table.
15. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
16. You can't get married to your sweetheart because there's a law against it.
17. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
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LMAO
(0 replies)
started by
roger
(03.02.2006 1:35:57 AM EST)
Those were hilarious
lmfao
(0 replies)
started by
bigjohn2
(02.28.2006 9:21:13 PM EST)
I love these the one about the value of your truck depending on how much gas you have in it....hahahaha
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