Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"Our military is performing brilliantly. See, the transition from torture chambers and rape rooms and mass graves and fear of authority is a tough transition. And they're doing the good work of keeping this country stabilized as a political process unfolds." —Bush, remarks on "Tax Relief and the Economy," Iowa, April 15, 2004
 
 

Random Quote
 
I can shoot with my left hand, I can shoot with my right hand... I'm amphibious.
— Charles Shackleford, NC State Basketball Player.
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#149 Theodore Roosevelt was the only president blind in one eye.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is like a rifle... four cocks and she's loaded.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: By psychologically breaking down her confidence with a rigorous behavior modification schedule, alternating between sensory deprivation and sensory overload, thereby breaking down her conception of self, leaving her unable to resist outside suggestion.
 
 


You might be a redneck if...

By: RobnoxiousPublished: 01/01/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

  • The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.

  • You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.

  • Last year you hid Easter eggs under cow pies.

  • You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

  • You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.

  • Jack Daniels makes your list of "Most Admired People."

  • You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.

  • You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

  • Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this!"

  • You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.'

  • You think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

  • Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

  • You go to your family reunion looking for a date.

  • Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

  • You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines."

  • You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels.

  • You take a six-pack cooler to church.

  • You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures.

  • The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it.

  • You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.

  • One of your kids was born on a pool table.

  • Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade.

  • You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.

  • You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard.

  • Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart 'cause there's a law against it.

  • You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school.

  • You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.

  • Your school fight song is "Dueling Banjos."

  • Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.

    Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

  • Related Links
  • You Might Be A Redneck Pt. 1
  • You know you're at a Redneck Church if...
  • Redneck Wedding
  • Redneck Barbie
  • Top 10 signs you're at a redneck wedding
  • Top 10 signs you're at a redneck wedding
  • Letter to a redneck son
  • An Irishman, a Mexican and an Alabama redneck
  • Top 10 ways to tell if a Redneck has been working on a computer
  • Top 10 ways to tell if a Red Neck has been working on a computer
  • Three guys and a genie
  • The Ventriloquist
  • The Three Hillbillies
  • The light
  • RedNeckese
  • 15 very funny misc. jokes
  • The Dialectizer
  • Barbie Gets Down
  • Barbie's Worst Nightmare
  • The supernatural

  • More Regional Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    Foxworthy's a genius (0 replies)
    started by bestwan
    (08.29.2000 8:39:51 PM EST)

    If you've ever used lard in bed...

    Say no to drugs. And drive in the right lane.

    you might be a redneck... (2 replies)
    started by jayblack
    (08.17.2000 11:38:50 AM EST)

    you mite be a redneck if your 1 year old has more teeth than you do.

    if you are reading my quote...quit and get your own.

    like I haven't heard all of those before (0 replies)  
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (07.14.2000 1:21:41 AM EST)

    kind of repetitive don't you think? they're the same things over and over and over again...but they're still pretty funny

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    3rd Grade Exam
    Miss Sally Edwards is a highly esteemed third grade ...
    09.29.2009

    And There Will Be Balance
    God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, ...
    07.23.2009

    Texas Sheriff Job Interview
    A man seeking to join a south Texas Sheriff's Department ...
    02.04.2009

    Nordakota Cow...
    Ole is a farmer in Minnesota. He is in need of a new ...
    01.25.2009

    Rate This!

    3.09 Goofballs of 5
    35 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    You Grew Up In Rural Iowa If . . .
    For all you Iowa wanna be's and those who love Iowan's, ...
    10.14.2008

    Mason Vs. Dixon
    A University of Georgia student was visiting a Yankee ...
    05.24.2008

    How To Install A Home Security System In The South
    1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's ...
    02.25.2008

    Oklahoma Leads In Communication History
    Last January the New Orleans Times Picayune reported ...
    01.23.2008

    Two Years Ago
    Redneck Vasectomy
    After having their 11th child, a redneck couple on welfare decided that their family finally was big enough, their monthly check wasn't big enough for them to rent a bigger trailer, and they were both too lazy to go get a job.
    10.30.2007

    The NZ Shipwreck Survivors
    A New Zealander, a sheep and a dog were survivors ...
    08.30.2007

    A Redneck's Pet
    On a hot summer day in Pennsylvania, a redneck came into town with his dog ...
    07.25.2007

    Ghost Sex
    A professor at University of Arkansas was giving a ...
    07.09.2007

    Lookie Here!
    Austin Powers: International Man of...

    Casino Joke
     
    I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
     
     

    Goofball Facts
     
    A turkey can run 20 miles per hour.