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George W. Bush
 
"This is a world that is much more uncertain than the past. In the past we were certain, we were certain it was us versus the Russians in the past. We were certain, and therefore we had huge nuclear arsenals aimed at each other to keep the peace. That's what we were certain of...You see, even though it's an uncertain world, we're certain of some things. We're certain that even though the 'evil empire' may have passed, evil still remains. We're certain there are people that can't stand what America stands for...We're certain there are madmen in this world, and there's terror, and there's missiles and I'm certain of this, too: I'm certain to maintain the peace, we better have a military of high morale, and I'm certain that under this administration, morale in the military is dangerously low."-Albuquerque, N.M., the Washington Post, May 31, 2000
 
 

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You must be either white trash, a redneck, or a resident of Arkansas, if...

By: Bill ClintonPublished: 06/24/2000
 
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  • Your yard has been proposed as a new landfill site.
  • Your wife's hair attracts bees.
  • Your kid's birth announcements include the phrase "rug rat."
  • Your mom's ever been arrested for poaching.
  • Your pocket knife has ever been referred to as "Exhibit A."
  • Your sister has a "Soldier of Fortune" subscription.
  • Your grandmother has ever been evicted from a bingo game for foul language.
  • Your Christmas tree has a deer stand in it.
  • You can belch most of the popular Christmas carols.
  • You get Odor Eaters for Christmas.
  • You've got "ammo" on Your Christmas list under the word "Mom."
  • You've ever used a carry-out as a mailing address.
  • You've ever stood in line more than 1 hour to get your picture taken with a freak of nature.
  • You've got a room temperature IQ.
  • You've got a trash bag as a passenger side window.
  • Your bank checks feature pictures of dogs fighting.
  • You've ever stabbed someone's hand while reaching for the last pork chop.
  • You've ever rolled Your riding lawn mower.
  • You've ever left Santa a beer and a Slim Jim.
  • Santa won't let your kids sit on his lap.
  • You think the "5 to 10 pounds" on the diaper box refers to how much the diaper will hold.
  • You ever asked the widow for her phone number at the funeral home.
  • You have a tattoo that says "Mother" and it's spelled wrong.

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    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM THREAD  
    Title: redundancy
    By: Anonymous Goofball
    Date: 06.25.2000 5:01 AM EST

    redneck, white trash, or Arkansas resident? isn't that a little redundant?

    [ All Posts ] [ Reply ] [ Where You Are ] [ New Thread ]

    Current Thread and Replies
    redundancy  
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (06.25.2000 5:01:05 AM EST)

    redneck, white trash, or Arkansas resident? isn't that a little redundant?


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