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George W. Bush
 
  • "And if one of those jobs are created, we must have a system which trains people for the jobs which actually exist." —Bush, discussing employment training Source: U.S. Newswire, "Remarks by the President on Employment Training," June 17, 2003
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    Visiting Australia

    By: bd2sonPublished: 12/10/2007
     
    Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

    These are from potential visitors. They were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a snide sense of humor.

    Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK).
    A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.

    Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
    A: Depends how much you've been drinking.

    Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
    A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.

    Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
    A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/ gatherers. Milk is illegal.

    Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
    A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets, especially the Taipans.

    Note - Australia’s inland Taipan snake is the world’s deadliest snake. The Taipan snake has a bite which is 50 times more toxic than a cobra’s.

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