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Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
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George W. Bush |
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"But the true threats to stability and peace are these nations that are not very transparent, that hide behind the-that don't let people in to take a look and see what they're up to. They're very kind of authoritarian regimes. The true threat is whether or not one of these people decide, peak of anger, try to hold us hostage, ourselves; the Israelis, for example, to whom we'll defend, offer our defenses; the South Koreans." -George W. Bush, in a media roundtable discussion, March 13, 2001
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Random Quote |
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"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. You just leave a lot of useless, noisy baggage behind."
— Jed Babbin, former Deputy Undersecretary of Defense
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Snapple Facts |
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#14 Camel's milk does not curdle.
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Yo Mama ... |
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... is so fat, She went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
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One Liners |
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Q. What is the best thing about dating a homeless woman?
A. You can drop her off anywhere.
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 Constipation Cure | | By: garibaldi | Published: 12/13/2002 | | |  |
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Sister Mary Margaret enters O'Flynn's liquor shop. "I'd like to buy a bottle of Irish whiskey", she tells O'Flynn. The owner of the store shakes his head and frowns. "A bottle of Irish whiskey? And you being a nun too."
"Oh no, no," Sister Mary Margaret exclaims. "It's for Father Reilly. His constipation, you know." O'Flynn smiles, nods, and puts a bottle into a bag. Sister Mary Margaret pays, takes the bag and goes on her way.
Later that day, O'Flynn closes shop for the day. On his way home he passes an alley. There in the alley is Sister Mary Margaret. She's rip roaring drunk, the empty bottle at her side.
"Sister!" O'Flynn scolds. "And you said it was for Father Reilly's constipation."
"It is," answers Sister Mary Margaret. "When he sees me, he's gonna shit!"
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| Lookie Here!
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Casino Joke |
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I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
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Goofball Facts |
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A redwood tree can expel more than 2 tons of water a day through its leaves.
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