Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"What is life choices about?"—Bush, speaking to student athletes Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Welcomes NCAA Champs," Feb. 24, 2003
 
 

Random Quote
 
"There's one way to find out if a man is honest: ask him; if he says yes, you know he is crooked."
— Groucho Marx
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#167 You have to play ping-pong for 12 hours to lose one pound.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
has one leg and a bicycle.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What is the difference between a hockey game and a High School reunion?
A: At a hockey game you see fast pucks.
 
 


How to convince him you're a virgin

By: UncleLouPublished: 02/23/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Shortly before her wedding day, a young bride-to-be anxiously approaches her mother for advice. "Mother, I'm very woried," she says, "Harry thinks I'm a virgin, but on our wedding night he'll find out my hymen is already broken, and he'll be devastated. What can I do?"

The mother replies, "Oh, that's an easy problem to solve. I had the same problem with your father. Just put a rubber band around your thigh. Then, on your wedding night, just as Harry begins to enter you, reach down and snap the rubber band. Harry will think it's your hymen snapping, and you'll be home free!"

The bride takes her mother's advice and, on her wedding day she puts a thick rubber band around her thigh. That night, just as her new husband begins to enter her, she reaches down and snaps the elastic band. "What was that snapping?" he asks excitedly.

"That was my hymen snapping," she replies.

"Well, would you please unsnap it," he asks, "You've got my balls stuck in it!"

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Marriage Brings As Much Happiness As $100,000
  • Love, Lust, and Marriage
  • Man Sentenced For Forced Marriage To Niece
  • Before and After Marriage
  • No Breast; No Marriage
  • Marriage conversion
  • Marriage
  • Perfect Marriage
  • The marriage
  • Marriage Guidance
  • Rules To Live By?
  • 21-Year-Old Babe On Bond for Bagging Underage Boy
  • Senior Citizens Given Book on Parenting Before Wedding
  • The New Bride
  • Prenuptual Advice from Kids
  • An Apology For The Sophie Topless Photo
  • Crotchless Panties
  • Mickey Rourke
  • Jackie's Joke of the Day - August 16, 2000
  • Man Says He Was Asleep When He Killed Wife

  • More Sex Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    that (0 replies)
    started by paparoach1
    (02.23.2001 1:03:57 PM EST)

    was ok

    We're going to infest

    OMG!! (0 replies)
    started by jmc4295
    (10.08.2000 11:23:10 PM EST)

    The wonders of rubber......

    LMFAO! (0 replies)
    started by kyeo
    (09.30.2000 9:24:45 PM EST)

    I love it!!! haha sucked in, if you're not a virgin, don't lie about it

    ouch (0 replies)  
    started by daveminster
    (08.19.2000 7:49:41 PM EST)

    see title for details

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Two Old Guys Comparing, Um, Well, You Decide...
    Two old guys are sitting in a bar when the first one ...
    05.01.2008

    Priorities Change As We Age
    As we age, our priorities change ...
    04.08.2008

    Beer And Mowing The Lawn
    On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, ...
    03.30.2008

    Best Divorce Letter Ever
    Dear Connie, I know the counselor said we shouldn't ...
    03.19.2008

    Rate This!

    3.25 Goofballs of 5
    153 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    7 Kinds Of Sex
    The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. This kind ...
    05.03.2007

    87 Year Old Woman Kills Husband
    One night a 87 yr old woman came home from Bingo to ...
    03.15.2007

    Woman Uses KY Jelly To Prevent Sex
    A husband came home with a tube of K Y jelly and said ...
    03.14.2007

    Social Security Sex
    Two men were talking. So, how's your sex life?" "Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex."
    03.12.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Dating Rituals
    First date: You get to kiss her goodnight ...
    05.14.2006

    Stroking It Rich
    There’s this dreadfully boring dude behind a counter ...
    05.02.2006

    Itchy Pussy
    A woman shopped at a nearby grocery store, noticed ...
    04.29.2006

    At The Zoo
    Two old ladies are walking through a zoo. They come ...
    03.04.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Top Comedy Movies

    Goofball Facts
     
    There are more beetles than any other kind of creature in the world.