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Assorted Goofiness
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George W. Bush |
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"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says: Fool me once, shame on [pause] shame on you. [Pause] Fool me [long, uncomfortable, agonizing pause] you can't get fooled again."Source: The Washington Post, "The Reliable Source," Lloyd Grove, Sept. 18, 2002
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Random Quote |
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"When I was in Boy Scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street."
— Steven Wright, Comedian
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Snapple Facts |
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#228 THere is a town in South Dakota named 'Tea'.
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Yo Mama ... |
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so ugly when she was born her incubator windows were tinted.
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One Liners |
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Q: What does Bill Clinton tell Hillary right after sex?
A: I'll be home in 15 minutes.
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 From a differnet angle | | By: Marvin | Published: 01/13/2000 | | |  |
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Two Kiwi's are working on a building site in Auckland. Phul
(Phil) & Muck (Mick).Anyway Phul turns to Muck & says "Cawww
I've gotta take a piss, but there's no where to go, eh"
"Walk out to the ind of this plank" replies Muck "I'll stand on
this ind & balance ut".
"Are You sure Muck?"
"Yis, no worries".
"100%?"
"YIS!!"
So out goes Phul to take a piss & the lunch siren sounds.
Muck forgets what he's supposed to be doing and steps off the
plank & Phul is a goner..........................
Several months later an Australian, a Frenchman & a bloke from
IN ZID (New Zealand) are sitting in a bar discussing which of
their respective Nations chase women hardest....
Wazza the Aussie says "Mate. I've been known to miss a piss-up
session with the boys trying to crack on to sheila's!!"
Pierre, the Frenchman says "No, No, No, Ve Frenchmen chase ze
women with much zest & give them gifts of love like Champagne
to win their affection, it is us vor sure".
Meanwhile Bob (the Kiwi) sits laughing and says "No, you blokes
are both wrong. The other month I was walking past a building
site following these two gorgeous Birds, and this bloke comes
plummeting from the sky with his dick in his hand screaming
"CUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!"
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hehehe
(0 replies)
started by
oxbrain
(01.14.2001 2:31:11 AM EST)
funny shit"They just fuck you and they fuck you and they fuck you some more.
And just when you think they're done fucking you, that's when the real fucking starts"
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Lol
(0 replies)
started by
yomammasmamma
(01.13.2001 1:20:15 PM EST)
i give it an 7 bird jokes tend to be funny.yo mamma!
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Goofball Facts |
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The word "karate" means "empty hand."
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