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George W. Bush
 
"See, we want everybody in this country, every person — we want the addict, we want the single lonely mom, we want the child, the dyslexic child — allto feel a part of the future of this country." —Bush, speaking in Dallas, Texas, on Oct. 29, 2003
 
 

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"Marijuana will be legal some day, because the many law students who now smoke pot will someday become congressmen and legalize it in order to protect themselves."
— Lenny Bruce
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#180 The first VCR was made in 1956 and was the size of a piano.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
head is so big she has to step into her shirts.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: How is Bin Laden like Fred Flintstone?
A: Both see Rubble when they look out their windows.
 
 


Pearly Gates

By: AnonymousPublished: 07/23/1999
 
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Three young women die and are brought to the gates of heaven. Upon entering the gates, they were halted by St. Peter and his obedient angel. St. Peter says to the girls, "Before entering heaven, you must each answer a simple question."

"Which is...?" they replied in unison.

"Have you been a good girl?" he asked the first young woman. "Oh yes!" she said. "I was a virgin before I got married and was still virgin even after I got married."

"Very good." said St.Peter. "Angel, give this young woman the golden key."

"Have you been a good girl?" he asked the second young woman. "Oh, quite good!" she said. "I was a virgin before I got married but was not after I got married."

"Very good." said St.Peter. "Angel, give this girl, the silver key."

"Have you been a good girl?" he asked the third young woman. "Oh no, not at all!" she said. "I practically had sex with every guy I met before and after I got married. Anywhere, anytime!"

"Very good!" said St.Peter. "Angel, give this girl my room key."

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second (0 replies)
started by blazed3wayz
(12.28.2000 8:20:45 PM EST)

i can't belive i'm second

it not what you can do for your country, it's how your country can fuck you over.

Didn't read it..... (0 replies)  
started by burlingtony
(08.31.2000 4:15:40 AM EST)

just wanted to be first.

Avoid socialism at all costs. The government which rules least---rules best. Keep the Pros out of the Olympics.

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