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A Dog Named Sex

By: bigtomatoPublished: 11/05/2000
 
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Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy." I call mine "Sex.

Now "Sex" has been very embarrassing for me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for "Sex." He said, "I'd like to have one, too." Then I said, "But this is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "But you don't understand. I've had 'Sex' since I was nine years old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for "Sex." He said every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand. 'Sex' keeps me awake at night!" The clerk said, "Me too."

One day I entered "Sex" in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have "Sex" in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have 'Sex' on TV." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight custody of the dog. I said, "Your honor, I had 'Sex' before I was married." The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, 'Sex' left me. He said, "Me too."

Last night "Sex" ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for 'Sex'."

My case comes up Friday.

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    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM THREAD  
    Title: My cat's nickname
    By: Anonymous Goofball
    Date: 11.06.2000 12:49 PM EST

    "Pussy"

    [ All Posts ] [ Reply ] [ Where You Are ] [ New Thread ]

    Current Thread and Replies
    My cat's nickname  
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (11.06.2000 12:49:29 PM EST)

    "Pussy"


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