Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"I want to thank the astronauts who are with us, the courageous spacial entrepreneurs who set such a wonderful example for the young of our country." - Washington, D.C., Jan. 14, 2004
 
 

Random Quote
 
"Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry with your girlfriends."
— Laurie Kuslansky
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#42 Frogs cannot swallow with their eyes open.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, The only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
A: They named him "Sum Ting Wong"
 
 


A Dog Named Sex

By: bigtomatoPublished: 11/05/2000
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy." I call mine "Sex.

Now "Sex" has been very embarrassing for me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for "Sex." He said, "I'd like to have one, too." Then I said, "But this is a dog!" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "But you don't understand. I've had 'Sex' since I was nine years old." He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for "Sex." He said every room in the place was for sex. I said, "You don't understand. 'Sex' keeps me awake at night!" The clerk said, "Me too."

One day I entered "Sex" in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have "Sex" in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have 'Sex' on TV." He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight custody of the dog. I said, "Your honor, I had 'Sex' before I was married." The judge said, "Me too." Then I told him that after I was married, 'Sex' left me. He said, "Me too."

Last night "Sex" ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4:00 in the morning?" I said, "I'm looking for 'Sex'."

My case comes up Friday.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Dog Coughs Up a Couple of Karats
  • Have Sex, Stay Young
  • Thieves Snort a Line Of Dog
  • Hunter Loses Eye To Rifle-Firing Dog
  • Where my dog?
  • Give A Dog A Bone
  • Drunk Dog
  • Downside to Anal Sex
  • Stupid sex laws
  • My Dog Rules
  • Sex Change Doctor on trial for Murder
  • Polish Sex Quiz
  • Anal Sex Euphemisms
  • Magic Sex Shoes
  • Walk The Dog
  • Superman's Sex Life
  • Arkansas Sex Test
  • Dog Gets Unique Memorial
  • The human male sex drive according to Bill Clinton
  • Dog Freezer Lands In Jail

  • More Sex Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM THREAD  
    Title: me too
    By: trafficjammer
    Date: 11.06.2000 5:00 PM EST

    That was the funniest thing i have seen all day but i know how you feel. The sex story is a spliting image of my life without the dog! I haven't been locked up yet so i guess i need to stay out of the alleys!









    DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU GOT TILL IT'S GONE! AND THERE'S NOTHING LIKE IT BUT MORE OF IT!

    [ All Posts ] [ Reply ] [ Where You Are ] [ New Thread ]

    Current Thread and Replies
    me too  
    started by trafficjammer
    (11.06.2000 5:00:25 PM EST)

    That was the funniest thing i have seen all day but i know how you feel. The sex story is a spliting image of my life without the dog! I haven't been locked up yet so i guess i need to stay out of the alleys!









    DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU GOT TILL IT'S GONE! AND THERE'S NOTHING LIKE IT BUT MORE OF IT!


    You must register to participate in this discussion.

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Gynecologist's Assistant
    A retired man went into the Job Center in Downtown ...
    11.13.2009

    A Whopping Baby Boy
    An LSU fan is drinking in a New York bar, when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar, announcing his wife has just given birth to a typical Louisiana baby boy weighing 25 pounds...
    09.27.2009

    Secret Surgery
    A sexually active woman tells her plastic surgeon ...
    08.11.2009

    Woodpecker Bragging Rights
    A Texas woodpecker and a New Mexico woodpecker were ...
    03.05.2009

    Rate This!

    3.33 Goofballs of 5
    115 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Flat Belly
    A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his ...
    11.15.2008

    Wife In a Coma
    Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath .One of them was washing her private area and noticed a slight response whenever she touched her there ...
    10.29.2008

    Abe Lincoln
    A man wearing a stovepipe hat, a fake beard, and a ...
    10.10.2008

    The Urinal Is Too High
    A group of 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders, accompanied by ...
    10.03.2008

    Two Years Ago
    A Wise Old Man
    An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend ...
    09.14.2007

    Do You Have A Good Health Plan?
    A wealthy hospital benefactor was being shown around ...
    08.25.2007

    Making Love In The VW
    Steve and Fiona were making passionate love in Steve's ...
    08.18.2007

    All Grandpas, Heed This WARNING:
    Do not lose your grandkids in the mall. A small ...
    08.16.2007

    Lookie Here!
    The Solo Joke Book

    Casino Joke
     
    I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
     
     

    Goofball Facts
     
    A dragonfly's penis has a shovel on the end that scoops out a rival male's semen.