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	George W. Bush
	"There's not going to be enough people in the system to take advantage of people like me."-On the coming Social Security crisis; Wilton, Conn.; June 9, 2000

	Random Quote
	"It's basically the same, just darker." — Alan Kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing Saturday nights as opposed to Sunday afternoons (1991)

	Snapple Facts
	#87 A mile on the ocean and a mile on land are not the same distance.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!

	One Liners
	Q: Mom's have Mother's Day, Father's have Father's Day. What do single guys have? A: Palm Sunday

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	Flat Belly A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his ... 11.15.2008 Wife In a Coma Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath .One of them was washing her private area and noticed a slight response whenever she touched her there ... 10.29.2008 Abe Lincoln A man wearing a stovepipe hat, a fake beard, and a ... 10.10.2008 The Urinal Is Too High A group of 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders, accompanied by ... 10.03.2008

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One Year Ago
	What a Coincidence A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. 11.30.2007 What a Coincidence A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. 11.29.2007 Still Not Hungry?? A woman asks her husband, "Would you like some bacon ... 11.26.2007 What A Scotsman Wears Under His Kilt A kilted Scotsman was walking down a country path ... 11.25.2007

Two Years Ago
	Escapee A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. 11.11.2006 Elderly Sexual Position Two old women talking over coffee happened upon the ... 11.03.2006 30 Year Reunion Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party ... 10.29.2006 Sunday Afternoon Quickie John and Marsha decided that the only way to pull ... 10.16.2006

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	Goofball Facts
	Impotence is ground for divorce in 24 U.S. states.