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	George W. Bush
	"It's important for [the United Nations'] words to mean what they say, andas we head into the 21st century, Mark, when it comes to our security, wereally don't need anybody's permission."—Bush, during a press conference in 2003 (in the 21st century) Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President George Bush Discusses Iraq inNational Press Conference," March 6, 2003

	Random Quote
	"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt." — Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice. (1982)

	Snapple Facts
	#153 The speed limit in NYC was 8 mph in 1895.

	Yo Mama ...
	is so hairy she looks like a Chia Pet with an Afro!

	One Liners
	Q: What do you call the blonde corpse in your attic? A: 1995 hide-and-seek champion!

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	Flat Belly A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his ... 11.15.2008 Wife In a Coma Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath .One of them was washing her private area and noticed a slight response whenever she touched her there ... 10.29.2008 Abe Lincoln A man wearing a stovepipe hat, a fake beard, and a ... 10.10.2008 The Urinal Is Too High A group of 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders, accompanied by ... 10.03.2008

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One Year Ago
	What a Coincidence A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. 11.30.2007 What a Coincidence A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. 11.29.2007 Still Not Hungry?? A woman asks her husband, "Would you like some bacon ... 11.26.2007 What A Scotsman Wears Under His Kilt A kilted Scotsman was walking down a country path ... 11.25.2007

Two Years Ago
	Escapee A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed. 11.11.2006 Elderly Sexual Position Two old women talking over coffee happened upon the ... 11.03.2006 30 Year Reunion Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party ... 10.29.2006 Sunday Afternoon Quickie John and Marsha decided that the only way to pull ... 10.16.2006

Lookie Here!
	Our Dumb Century

	Goofball Facts
	The fingerprints of koala bears are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene.