Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think vulcanize society. So I don't know how that fits into what everybodyelse is saying, their relative positions, but that's my position."-The San Francisco Chronicle, Jan. 21, 2000
 
 

Random Quote
 
"No animal ever invented anything as bad as drunkenness - or as good as drink."
— G.K. Chesterton
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#108 Licking a stamp burns 10 calories.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours... for a quote!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. What's the difference between hobos & homos?
A. Hobos have no friends, and homos have friends coming out their ass.
 
 


Salary Increase Request

By: marvinPublished: 09/03/2003
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do phyical labor
I work at great depths
I plunge head first into everything I do
I do not get weekends off or public holidays
I work in a damp environment
I don't get paid overtime
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation
I work in high temperatures
My work exposes me to contagious diseases


Dear Penis:

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight
You fall asleep on the job after brief work period
You do not always follow the orders of the management team
You do not stay in your allocated position, and often visit other areas
You do not take initiative - you need to be stimulated in order to start working
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing
You'll retire well before reaching 65
You're unable to work double shifts
You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed the day's work
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying 2 suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,
The Management

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Police Notice Increase in Guns in Canadian Schools
  • Salary survey
  • Sponsor a Baseball Player
  • Can I Buy You a Wunder Titte?
  • About that Job Opening...
  • Iīll Take Michael Douglasīs Chin to Go, Please
  • Rangers: More Guns Entering Yellowstone
  • Manīs Dream of a Bigger Penis is a Bit of a Stretch
  • Greta Protests the Postal Rate Hike
  • Doctors Rebuild Penises In New Technique
  • The Cutting Edge of Medical Science
  • Suicide Rate Delays British Trains.
  • Bizarre Newspaper Ads
  • Job Perks
  • Government Retirement
  • Snowball Fight
  • The Case of Aunt Jamima
  • Canada Battles Cow Flatulence
  • Drop The Pounds...Add The Inches
  • Farm Workers Paid In The Wurst Way

  • More Sex Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    LMAO @ Jimbo (0 replies)
    started by thegrandpatron
    (09.03.2003 8:35:10 AM EST)

    Hahahahaha

    My boss would say.... (2 replies)  
    started by jimbo
    (09.03.2003 0:15:51 AM EST)

    "don't even think about a raise, you prick"



    Eat CANADIAN Beef


    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Flat Belly
    A little boy walks into his parents' room to see his ...
    11.15.2008

    Wife In a Coma
    Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath .One of them was washing her private area and noticed a slight response whenever she touched her there ...
    10.29.2008

    Abe Lincoln
    A man wearing a stovepipe hat, a fake beard, and a ...
    10.10.2008

    The Urinal Is Too High
    A group of 2nd, 3rd and 4th graders, accompanied by ...
    10.03.2008

    Rate This!

    2.00 Goofballs of 5
    5 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    What a Coincidence
    A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne.
    11.30.2007

    What a Coincidence
    A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne.
    11.29.2007

    Still Not Hungry??
    A woman asks her husband, "Would you like some bacon ...
    11.26.2007

    What A Scotsman Wears Under His Kilt
    A kilted Scotsman was walking down a country path ...
    11.25.2007

    Two Years Ago
    Escapee
    A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed.
    11.11.2006

    Elderly Sexual Position
    Two old women talking over coffee happened upon the ...
    11.03.2006

    30 Year Reunion
    Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunited at a party ...
    10.29.2006

    Sunday Afternoon Quickie
    John and Marsha decided that the only way to pull ...
    10.16.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Dilbert Gives You the ...

    Goofball Facts
     
    Elephants are the only animal that cannot jump.