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Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
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George W. Bush |
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"I mean, these good folks are revolutionizing how businesses conduct their business. And, like them, I am very optimistic about our position in the world and about its influence on the United States. We're concerned about the short-term economic news, but long-term I'm optimistic. And so, I hope investors, you know - secondly, I hope investors hold investments for periods of time - that I've always found the best investments are those that you salt away based on economics." - Austin, Texas, Jan. 4, 2001
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Random Quote |
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"Guys aren't albe to get $15 or $20 million [a year] anymore, so you have to play for the love of the game."
— Orlando Magic star Penny Hardaway, bemoaning the NBA's new salary cap
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Snapple Facts |
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#74 You share your birthday with 9 million others in the world.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so fat she stands in two time zones.
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One Liners |
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Q. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A. A nervous wreck.
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 Doctor's Visit | | By: thegrandpatron | Published: 12/31/2003 | | |  |
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Jim went to the doctor and said, "Doctor, I've got a problem, but if you're going to treat it, first you've got to promise not to laugh."
"Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."
"Okay then," Jim said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor has ever seen. Unable to control himself, the doctor fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure.
"I'm so sorry," he said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now what seems to be the problem?"
"It's swollen." Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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Goofball Facts |
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O.J. Simpson was considered for the role of the Terminator, but the producers feared he wouldn't be taken seriously.
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