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Assorted Goofiness
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George W. Bush |
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"He has certainly earned a reputation as a fantastic mayor, because the results speak for themselves. I mean, New York's a safer place for him to be."-On Rudy Giuliani, The Edge With Paula Zahn, May 18, 2000
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Random Quote |
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"Mars is essentially in the same orbit... Mars is somewhat the same distance from the Sun, which is very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we believe, and water. If there is water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can breathe." Vice President Dan Quayle, 8/11/89
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Snapple Facts |
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#90 The average raindrop falls at 7mph.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so stupid when she read on her job application to not write below the dotted line she put "O.K."
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One Liners |
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Q: What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A: A bingo machine.
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 Stupid Amellican Doctor | | By: DannyPires | Published: 08/07/2000 | | |  |
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An American tourist, named Robert, goes on a trip to China. While in China, he is very sexually promiscuous and does not take precautions.
A week after arriving back home in the States, he awakes one morning to find his sex organ covered with bright green and purple spots. Horrified, he immediately goes to see his doctor. The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days, for the results.
The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, "I've got bad news for you. You've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here. We know very little about it." The man looks a little relieved and says, "Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, doc." The doctor answers, "I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate your penis." The man screams in horror, "Oh no! I want a second opinion!" The doctors replies, "Well it's your choice. Go ahead if you want, but surgery is your only choice."
The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease. The Chinese doctor examines his member and proclaims, "Ah yes, Mongolian VD. Velly lare disease." The guys says to the doctor, "Yeah, yeah, I already know that, but what can you do? My American doctor wants to operate and amputate my penis!" The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs, "Stupid Amellican doctor! Amellican doctor, always want to opulate. Make more money, that way. No need to opulate!"
"Oh, thank God!" the man replies. "Yes!" says the Chinese doctor, "You no worry! Wait two weeky. It gonna fall off by itself!" Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? |  | |  | Related Links Dear Penis
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More Sex Jokes...
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ARTICLE FORUM LIST |
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You must register to participate in this discussion.
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poor bastard
(0 replies)
started by
DaWolfE
(08.25.2000 4:17:41 PM EST)
that sad and cruel, thats nothin to joke about
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Fukkin' Asians......
(0 replies)
started by
sigma
(08.11.2000 2:44:19 AM EST)
Yet another reason Asians should be made extinct
I TOOK MY PROZAC!
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this is...
(0 replies)
started by
bat
(08.09.2000 8:47:16 AM EST)
nothing to joke about, my uncle had this desiese & they had to gut my auntLove your country,Question your government.
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hahahahahaha
(0 replies)
started by
rook30505
(08.08.2000 2:35:00 AM EST)
that was almost funny,but it wasn'tSpank my ass!
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..losing my religion....
(0 replies)
started by
NakedCanuck
(08.07.2000 8:55:17 PM EST)
Damn, there's nothin funny about losin your friendsThe Naked Canuck
Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.
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only his "sex organ"?
(0 replies)
started by
Anonymous Goofball
(08.07.2000 10:08:58 AM EST)
Why were'nt his lips multi-colored as well? Or his fingers? It was just straight-sex?
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the dick doc joke
(0 replies)
started by
Dogma
(08.07.2000 8:31:35 AM EST)
If I woke up with a technicolor dick I'd want a second opinion too. Going to the dick doc must suck.
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Casino Joke |
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I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
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Goofball Facts |
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A woman's buttocks protrude 25% more when she wears high heals.
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