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Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
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JokeDump
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George W. Bush |
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"It's important for [the United Nations'] words to mean what they say, andas we head into the 21st century, Mark, when it comes to our security, wereally don't need anybody's permission."—Bush, during a press conference in 2003 (in the 21st century) Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President George Bush Discusses Iraq inNational Press Conference," March 6, 2003
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Random Quote |
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"But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."
— Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling Gator fans that a fire at Auburn's football dorm haddestroyed 20 books. (1991)
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Snapple Facts |
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#153 The speed limit in NYC was 8 mph in 1895.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so hairy she shaves with a weedwhacker
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One Liners |
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Q: What do you call the blonde corpse in your attic?
A: 1995 hide-and-seek champion!
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 National Condom Week | | By: Robnoxious | Published: 12/01/1998 | | |  |
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The following is a list of possible slogans promoting National Condom Week.
- Cover your stump before you hump.
- Before you attack her, wrap your wacker.
- Don't be silly ... protect your willy.
- Before you blast her, guard your bushmaster.
- Don't be a loner ... cover your boner.
- When in doubt, shroud your sprout.
- You can't go wrong if you shield your dong.
- If yor're not going to sack it, go home and whack it.
- If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey.
- Before you bag her, sheath your dagger.
- It'll be sweeter if you wrap your peter.
- If you slip between thighs, be sure to
condomize.
- To save embarrassment later, cover your 'gator.
- She won't be sick if you wrap your dick.
- If you go into heat, package your meat.
- While undressing Venus, dress that penis.
- When you take off her pants and blouse, suit-up that trouser mouse.
- Never deck her with an unwrapped pecker.
- Especially in December, gift wrap your member.
- Befo' da van start rockin', be sho' yo' cock got a stockin'.
- Don't be a fool, vulcanize your tool.
- The right selection? Sack that erection.
- Wrap it in foil before checking her oil.
- A crank with armor will never harm her.
Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com? | | | | Related Links
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Casino Joke |
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I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
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Goofball Facts |
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The underside of a horse's hoof is called a frog. The frog peels off several times a year with new growth.
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