A woman is enjoying a good game of golf with her girlfriends one day. Suddenly she exclaims, "Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He's going to be really ticked if it's not ready on time."
When she gets home, she realizes she doesn't have enough time to go to the supermarket, and all she has in the way of food is a wilted lettuce leaf, an egg, and a can of cat food. In a panic, she opens the can of cat food, stirs in the egg and garnishes it with the lettuce leaf just as her husband is pulling up.
She greets her husband and then watches as he sits down to his dinner. To her surprise, her husband is really enjoying his dinner. "Darling, this the best dinner you have made for me in forty years of marriage. You can make this for me any day."
Needless to say, every golf day from then on, the woman made her husband the same dish. She tells her golf partners about it and they are all horrified. "You're going to kill him!" they exclaim.
Two months later, her husband dies.
The women say to her, "You killed him! We told you that feeding him that cat food every week would do him in! How can you just sit there so calmly, knowing you murdered your husband?"
The wife replies, "I did not kill him. He fell off the window sill while he was licking his ass."